Personal jokes
What's the difference between a dog from an Asian person and a cat from an Asian person?
Only the taste.
Hey, I just want to give a round of applause to Shooter McFly, single-handedly keeping the jokes section alive. Unappreciated, well, Shooter, one person here appreciates you, at least.
What's the difference between a dead person and a walkie-talkie?
A dead person does not walkie or talkie.
Why can’t you have a proper conversation with a gay person?
They’re never straight with you.
Who is not hungry in Africa?
A dead person.
I saw a Black person riding a bike, so I ran back to my garage. He was still eating.
A normal exorcism is getting a demon out of a person, but a reverse exorcism is the devil telling the priest to get out of the child.
What can’t a person with no arms do: if you're happy and you know it, clap your hands.
It's sad when the person that gave you memories becomes a memory.
You know one of the worst feelings ever to exist?
When your parents and friends all still see the happy little kid you used to be...
...but in reality, that kid has been long gone for years. (not my words)
What does a person eat before a race?
Answer: They fast.
Person 1: How many people has Michael Jackson fingered?
Person 2: Dunno, what’s the minor population?
What do you say to a person who got his whole left side cut off? "Are you all right?!"
What do you call a person with 2 black eyes?
Nothing, you told them twice.
They say there's a person capable of murder in every friend group.
I suspected that it was Dave, so I killed him before he could cause any harm.
How do you tell an Indian person from a Muslim?
Are you 7/11 or 9/11?
What is a deaf person's favorite game?
Charades.
When your teenager asks for personal space and you remind her that she came out of your personal space.
Feeling stressed? Have a nice cup of tea and spill it in the lab of the person bothering you.
Dumb person: Wat idk mean?
Person 1: I don’t know.
Dumb one: Oh u don’t know okie I ask Googol.
Person 1: Wait idk means--
Dumb one (to Googol): WAT DOS IDK MANNN?
Googol: I don’t know.
Dumb one: OH ME GOOOD EVEN GOGLO DOESYN KNOWWW
I asked a person in a wheelchair if they wanted to fight. All I had to do is say, "Stand up!"