Personal Jokes

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

What's a suicidal person's favorite game? Hangman

What's a depressed person's least favorite type of cereal???

LIFE

What's a depressed person's favorite drink? A depresso espresso.

It's cyanide.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

I lost a race with a handicapped person today. The problem was the race was all stairs.

Gravity sure is fast

The definition of a stalker is two people going on a romantic walk but only one person knows about it.

How to complement a depressed person: I like your cuts g

Me, trying to interact with people: “Hey, are you a rope? Because I really wanna HANG with you”

Person I’m talking to: *Pulling out phone to call suicide hotline* “haha what”

You know it's only considered murder if there's a body. Otherwise it's just a missing person.

What's the similarity between a Christmas ornament and a person?

They both hang...

The only time you see a depressed person lifted up - when they hang themselves.

Isn't gwen the most thoughtful person?

people call me a bad person but just the other day i saw a little kid crying and asked him where were his parents , i love working at the orphanage

You: Say "addicted" after everything I say. Person: Uh okay. You: When you're obsessed with candy you are...? Person: Addicted. You: When you're obsessed with drugs you are...? Person: Addicted. You: What hit you in the face last night? Person: Addicted... *laughs* (It's supposed to sound like "A dick did")

A rapist walks into a school and asks if they had 5 year olds in the school and the teacher replies "are you that same person who took Jimmy?" the man replies "yes" and the teacher says "Take susie too she's being a little bitch."

Lol making jokes about cancer makes me feel better as a person that had cancer, it’s great

Never take a person canoeing or kayaking if they had a cerebrovascular accident. They’ll hear the one word they hate the most. “STROKE, STROKE, STROKE”