What's the one thing that makes a depressed person jump? A bridge.
Personal Jokes
What do you call a Chinese person with 1 leg? Tie Son Whu.
"The rise of atheism is going to lead to a break down of social morals and lead to all kinds of filth, including an increase in child abuse," said the village priest.
The village scientists did some fact checking. In prison, they found roughly 70% of child abusers were hyper religious before committing the crimes, and another 20% converted to religions to look 'remorseful'. The remaining 10% preferred not to say. They presented the findings to the media.
"Scientists slander good religious folk and ignore the weight of evidence!"
"Is Science biased against religion? You decide in this survey," they reported.
The village priest is living at his majesty's convenience and tells the others he committed armed robbery.
"Why is this a joke? It's not even funny!" said the person reading this, breaking the forth wall.
What is funny is you got to the end of this post and didn't cringe. Why not?
If someone is bullying you for being fat, remember, you're the bigger person, a MUCH bigger person.
What do you call a black person in a dark room?
Invisible.
Personally, I think putting beans on toast is better than bullets in children.
What’s a gay person’s favorite race track?
Rainbow Road.
Ever noticed that "lol" looks like a person drowning?
What do you call a Black person going down a waterslide? Sewage.
What do you call a person that [proudly] knows only one language? A bloody seppo.
What do you call a person that speaks five languages? A Euro waiter.
Ruin a quote by attributing it to the wrong person.
"Don't cry because it is over. Smile because it happened." -Adolf Hitler, 1945.
Yo mama so fat, she doesn't count as 1 person bro, she counts as 40 people.
What's the difference between a dog from an Asian person and a cat from an Asian person?
Only the taste.
What do you call a Chinese person with no legs?
Lim Ping.
I’m light as a feather, yet the strongest person can’t hold me for five minutes. What am I?
Chuck Norris is the only man that ever had sex with my wife and survived. Oh, how did I survive?
Fortunately, being her husband, I was the one person she wasn't fucking.
My wife is the only person that has "missing" posters attached to her ass.
If a fat person were to go on a flying car, it will just be at the ground. When they exit, it will just fly up.
What do you call a Japanese person when their knees are cured?
"Happynese" (happy knees).
What do you get when you cross breed a bear with a retarded person?
A feminist (a hairy and brainless beast).
