Person Jokes

Lol making jokes about cancer makes me feel better as a person that had cancer, it’s great

Never take a person canoeing or kayaking if they had a cerebrovascular accident. They’ll hear the one word they hate the most. “STROKE, STROKE, STROKE”

Person: 'Doctor, doctor I've only got 50 seconds to live'

Doctor: 'Just give me a minute'

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

What do you call it when a person with downsyndrome gets friendzoned?

Chromozoned

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

What do EMO kids use as birth control? Their Personalities.

why does Hitler deserve heavens, because he killed Hitler.

(Set up joke for the actual joke) So why don’t blind people go sky diving? It scares the hell out of their seeing eye dog. (Actual joke) When does a blind person know when he’s about to hit the ground? The leash goes slack.

There was the person who sent ten different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.

A woman decides to take a well-earned vacation and she asks her brother to watch her cat while she's away.

On the second day, when she calls her brother to see how things are going he tells her bluntly that the cat is dead.

The woman is really upset and goes into hysterics, before saying, "You can't tell a person bad news so bluntly. You should break the news gently. The first day, you should have said that Fluffy was stuck on the roof and couldn't get down. The second day, you could have said that she had fallen, but the vet said she would be okay. Then on the third day you could have said that she died from complications."

The next day, the woman calls her brother again and asks how things are. He says, "Well, Grandma is stuck on the roof and can't get down ..."

there was always that one SPECIFIC person u THOUGHT ruined ur life,but it turns out ur life has always been ruined by u being in it..

What would fall out of a tree first? A depressed person or a feather?.

Answer: The feather wouldn't. The rope would stop the person from falling all the way.

I offered to share a Meal with an Homeless Person once but he said "Piss off and buy your Own"

Kid: Mum how do you know someone is drunk? Mum: See the four birds over there Kid: huh, wait a minute. Mum: A drunk person would see eight. Kid: Mum but there is only two.