Person jokes

Pizza

A no legged manager runs the nearest pizza place called Your Pizza Is A Joke.

I (J0K35) worked there and this happened...

Manager: WHY ARE THE PINEAPPLES IN THE TRASH?

Me: Because nobody eats fucking pineapple pizza.

Manager: THAT'S IT! I'M KICKING YOU OUT OF THIS PLACE!

Me: You can't kick me out.

Manager: Why not? Huh?

Me: Because you need legs to kick, and you don't have any.

Suicide

Random person: Minecraft is actually more peaceful than real life.

Me: Well, screw life. Maybe if I light a fire on myself, I will go to Minecraft (my excuse for suicide).

Anal Sex

What’s the difference between anal sex and vegetables? One is cruel to the person getting it in, the other is vegetables.

Mama

Yo mama so fat, she doesn't count as 1 person bro, she counts as 40 people.

Memes

Nun

What do you call the nun that hates?

For Paul Walker, Mother Teresa.

Orphan

Orphan lady: Ok kids, someone donated groceries.

Orphans: YAY!

5 minutes later...

Orphans: Wait... where's the...

Orphan lady: *tries to hold daughter*

Person who donated: *holds milk in hand* hehe

Line

The average person in 2023 is less straight than the lines my 5th-grade P.E. teacher walked in college.

Femboy

No one will fight me, who is brave and strong enough to beat this beta simp femboy?

Fart

Person 1: Somebody farted.

Person 2: No, all I can smell is your breath.

Mama

Your mama is so fat, it said "To be continued..." then it loaded and said "One person at a time!"