Person jokes
Why couldn’t the midget talk?
Because someone stepped on him.
Why did the bird lay an egg on Stephen Hawkings?
Because he is Stephen HAWKings.
What does Stephen Hawking eat for his breakfast, lunch, and dinner?
His shoulder.
If a person walks off a hundred-foot cliff and halfway down screams, "Why did I do that?" Then a second person walks off the same one-hundred-foot cliff and screams the same verse, "Why did I do that?" Then another person walks off the cliff and screams the same line, "Why did I do that," and the next person does the same thing. What do you call that?
(Stupid People)
What do you call a person?
A person.
Memes
If your name is Caleb or Connor, you have a problem.
This disabled girl started rolling after me, so I ran to the stairs.
Why can't orphans become famous?
Because it will become easier for Technoblade to track them down.
What's one thing you should never ask a suicidal person? "Are you okay?" because the next day they'll either be dead or have a lot more cuts than they started with.
To those who are dead now, was it fun?
Evan David Sandri is gay and he is adopted.
Me: What do we need from there? I have a few things to do before I head out to the store, and then I will be home to pick up the stuff.
Random person: What stuff? 🤨
Me: What?
The person: You said you’re going to pick up “the stuff”!!! What do you mean by that?!
Me: Colourful flamingo fart.
A no legged manager runs the nearest pizza place called Your Pizza Is A Joke.
I (J0K35) worked there and this happened...
Manager: WHY ARE THE PINEAPPLES IN THE TRASH?
Me: Because nobody eats fucking pineapple pizza.
Manager: THAT'S IT! I'M KICKING YOU OUT OF THIS PLACE!
Me: You can't kick me out.
Manager: Why not? Huh?
Me: Because you need legs to kick, and you don't have any.
Person: Guess what?
Other person: What?
Person: Chicken butt!
Random person: Minecraft is actually more peaceful than real life.
Me: Well, screw life. Maybe if I light a fire on myself, I will go to Minecraft (my excuse for suicide).
What’s the difference between anal sex and vegetables? One is cruel to the person getting it in, the other is vegetables.
That one person who can never bring a smile to your face...
Until you push them down 3 flights of stairs.
Your momma!
Looks like he never charged up fully.
What’s an autistic person's favorite movie:
A Quiet Place?
Q: What did the Jewish person say when he beat me in a race?
A: Eat my dust.