People jokes
People tell Kobe to fly high, but when he flew high, he died.
I'm hertophobic.
It means I'm allergic to straights.
Tech administrator of a school: Hm, a message from Google security?
Tech administrator of a school: OH SHIT!
Assistant: WHAT, WHAT, TELL ME?
Tech administrator of a school: WE'VE BEEN COMPROMISED, WE FORGOT TO SECURE THE SITE!
Assistant: OK, OK, THE KEY IS NOT TO PANIC... let's call the school board.
A FEW MOMENTS LATER
Head of school board: HAHAHAHAHAHA! That's a good one, almost as good as the one with Jack, Jill, and the ripped condom! HAHAHAHAHAHA
Tech administrator of a school: HAHAHA yeah I know right *whispers* you are playing it cool, right?
Head of school board: *whispers* yeah we're fucked...
TWO HOURS LATER
Important fat people in one room: OH FUCK OH NO, HELP PLEASE!!!!! WAIT, HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO TELL THE PARENTS ABOUT THEIR STOLEN INFORMATION!!!
AND SO THAT WAS THE BIRTH OF RIOTING TEACHER
Why can’t blind people sing [if] that can’t hear because they can see the lyrics?
Stop ruining the jokes. It's called "worst jokes ever" for a reason. We all feel bad for orphans, but people like dark humor and joke about everyone, so quit being offended, please.
Memes
If a person walks off a hundred-foot cliff and halfway down screams, "Why did I do that?" Then a second person walks off the same one-hundred-foot cliff and screams the same verse, "Why did I do that?" Then another person walks off the cliff and screams the same line, "Why did I do that," and the next person does the same thing. What do you call that?
(Stupid People)
What's the difference between Black and White people?
Blacks don't need N-Word Passes.
One apple a day keeps the doctor away; not logging onto servers using management or service accounts keeps SecOps people away.
What did the people who cracked the Liberty Bell get for breaking it?
The no-bell prize.
How could the German people fall for Hitler and the Nazis?
There were an awful lot of red flags!
What do birds and autistic people have in common?
They both flap their arms.
What's handsome and smart, you can hear him and see him? It's you good-looking guys! So sad you can't read this since you're blind. Oh geez, I just found this website and I want to make people laugh. Too bad they can't see the joke.
I know why nobody likes my comments, because they got no sense of humor. That's why they dislike it. Now I know depression is a joke, a joke that never gets a laugh. =[ WHYYYY NO ONE LAUGH AT MY JOKES?
What's the difference between a redhead and an orangutan?
Some people adopt orangutans.
Okay, who the heck is watersharky? He just tries to "help" people, and he just posts stupid songs because he acts like he is depressed.
I told a 9/11 joke to my friends today.
It didn't land well.
I hate it when people think I'm a boy because I have short hair. I mean, I'm gay, what do you expect?
Why did the wheel fall?
Because there were too many fat people on it.
Stop with dumb orphan jokes, you dumb ass people!!!!!!!!!!
They're not funny one bit, so stop!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why are people so good at basketball? They can run, steal, and shoot!