People jokes
How many people can you fit in a car?
6 - 3 in the back, 2 in the front, and my nan in the ashtray.
Bro, imagine shooting a school for autistic people.
One day, there were three people: a mom and two kids. One of the kids walks up and asks her mom why she was named Rose. Her mom told her that she ate a rose petal when she was born; that is why she was named Rose.
Then the second child walked up and yelled, "Ahhhhhh!" and the mom said, "Shut up, Billy Goat!"
People, when your lover cheats on you, do this!
1. Start a conversation. 2. Say, "What's that smell?" 3. They will smell around. 4. Say, "OMG, it's a b****," and walk away and ignore them.
Hey Danda, :^, Alex, Dangggg, Alya Kuhl, Jessica, Samantha, and Ariana!
People complain we are overpopulated.
Well, then if we committed suicide, then why do they be sad? It's one less person to think about. Why complain about it when in the end we become sad people?
People are so f***ed up. I belated "Frickin' BTW!"
What's the difference between an orphanage and a supermarket?
People actually want stuff in a supermarket.
When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don't find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.
Why do people like dating us emo girls? Because of the texture on our thighs.
I constantly wonder how people can live happily ever after, but then I realized that antidepressants don't make you OD.
Ugly kid, people keep saying I'm ugly.
Me: They're certainly not wrong.
Call me an escalator because I let people down.
Why was everybody so tired on April 1st? Because they just finished a March of 31 days!
People have houses, but I don't have a house because I don't have parents, said the orphan.
One thing about disabled people is they never set foot in prison.
I hate when my brother dates other people.
Just kidding! 😵😵😵😵
Man: I'm here for the job interview.
Employer: Oh good, good. Sit down. We don't get many people for the interviews.
Man: Just anywhere?
Employer: Yeah, make yourself comfortable. Jackson, right?
Man: Yeah, that's me.
(Shakes hands and sits back down)
Employer: So what makes you eligible for the job, Jackson?
Man: Well, I'm really good at capturing the perfect shot and angle. It really takes dedication to do this type of job. Concentration and willpower, sir.
Employer: I like you already, you're hired!
Man: Wow, thanks, sir. I know I won't do you wrong. I'll work hard for this job!
Employer: You start now! Your first person is a man named John F Kennedy.
Man: What? You want me to just take pictures of him during the parade?
Employer: No.
Man: This... This is a photography job, right?
Employer: No... this is a job employment for man hunting.
How do you make people mad? You use the wrong category. It makes them go red.
My grandpa kept warning the people on the Titanic that the boat was going to sink. Result: he got kicked out of the movie theater.