People jokes
What's the difference between a joke and the Twin Towers? People don't laugh at my jokes.
Fat people are like the Twin Towers. Once they go down, they don’t come back up.
There are only 2 things I hate in this world:
1. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures. 2. The French.
Q. What do you get when you cross Vince Li with a bus? A. A whole lot of people who wished they'd missed the bus that day.
Yo mama so fat...
...people in Florida start buying flood insurance when they see her waddling toward the ocean.
I saw names carved into a tree and thought it was romantic. Until I realized how many people bring knives on dates.
Why do old people swallow popcorn kernels?
To make their cremation more entertaining when they die.
Why are people born in December, January, and February easy to get along with?
They're cool and chill.
What do Spider-Man and suicidal people have in common?
They both hang.
What do you call two homeless people throwing rocks at each other?
A pillow fight.
What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? “If we don’t get some support, people will think we’re nuts.”
It's often said that people peaked in high school.
I think Trump peaked in kindergarten.
What do sharks and people have in common? The great ones are white.
What do you call a group of black people in a shed?
Antique farm equipment.
There are people weirder looking than me.
Like who?
Like people with Down syndrome.
Inside a room full of squares, buckets, and tints, there are two inspectors. One is called Mr. Right, the other one is called Mr. Wrong. Because of their names, the first one is trusted more than the second one.
Mr. Wrong eventually got tired of that and worked on a plan for how more people could trust him. He took a jigsaw and he started to cut into his brain and sawed away half of his brain. It was still working.
Then he took a loaf of toast, cut it into half and glued it on his head, and then he made a strawberry cream and sprayed it on the toast. Because people couldn't recognize him as "Mr. Wrong," he was able to solve more cases.
I've had conversations with many people. Some of them were drier than my dad's ashes.
What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?
If we don't get some support soon, people are gonna think we're nuts.
My cousin said he wonders why people have sex with animals, and now I can’t stop thinking about it.
Ol’ McDonald had a farm e-I-e-I-oh.
You can’t say “dwarf” anymore; you have to say “little people”.
You can’t say “fat”; you have to say “plus size”.
You can’t say “retard”; you have to say “democrat”.