People

People jokes

What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?

If we don't get some support soon, people are gonna think we're nuts.

My cousin said he wonders why people have sex with animals, and now I can’t stop thinking about it.

Ol’ McDonald had a farm e-I-e-I-oh.

You can’t say “dwarf” anymore; you have to say “little people”.

You can’t say “fat”; you have to say “plus size”.

You can’t say “retard”; you have to say “democrat”.

This guy goes to a bar and pulls out a little guy playing the piano. The bartender asks him where he got a small man with a piano.

The guy points outside to a genie granting people wishes. The bartender runs out and 1 million ducks appear.

The bartender yells at the genie saying, “Are you fucking deaf? I asked for 1 million bucks, not 1 million bucks!”

The guy from the bar says, “No shit! You think I really asked for a 12-inch pianist?”

I only got one question wrong on my biology test yesterday.

The question was, "What is most commonly found in a cell?"

Apparently, "Black People" wasn't the right answer.

Trump wants people to think he's a great golfer. But the only handicap he has is a mental one.

Some people think jokes about child abuse are funny.

I'm not sure if I think that, but they do seem to hit different.

Katy Perry can't sing, can't dance, doesn't write music, is unbelievably ugly, and is unable to decipher maths or science. Really though, I didn't realize going down on a record executive would later lead her to be one of the people able to go to space.

Why do black people only have nightmares?

Because the last one to have a dream got shot. (Martin Luther King joke)

Do you know what's in common between a hitman and a photographer?

They all shoot people for a living.

I was in a school shooting a few years ago, 3 people died.

I guess that’s what you get when you’re bad at hide and seek.