Pedophile jokes
How do you tell when a blonde just lost her virginity?
Her crayons are still wet.
What did the pretty young pre-pubescent 14 year old boy say when he got a homosexual pedophile for Christmas?
He said he was awfully touched!
What’s the difference between a doctor and a pedophile?
The doctor doesn’t enjoy giving physicals.
What do pedophiles and a SpongeBob intro have in common?
Are you ready kids?
Him: *slowly drives past elementary school while looking at kids*
Her: Why are you staring at those kids? *jokingly* Are you like a pedophile or something?
Him: ... At least you know why I love calling you "baby" now~
If there is a hair, the meat is ruined.
I have a question: Does aging affect corpses, too?
Just asking to know if I still count as a pedophile or not!
Two guys in a car get pulled over by a cop. The cop taps the window, and the window rolls down. "Good evening, gentlemen, we're looking for two pedophiles."
The guy quickly closes the window. Ten seconds later, he lowers it again and says, "Ok, we'll do it."
Why do pedophiles go to a nursery?
Early access.
Statistically, 1 in 10 people live next door to a pedophile. But not me, I live next to a 10-year-old boy with a fat ass.
What was the pedophile charged with when he was arrested? A minor offense.
What is a pedophile's favorite age range?
9-11.
What's the similarity between pedophiles and school shooters?
They both shoot when they see kids.
What do you call pedophiles on a beach? Pedos in Speedos.
If you hate pedophiles, grow up.
What’s one good thing about pedophiles?
They drive slow in school zones.
A pedophile is at a school parent night. He's holding hands with an eight-year-old girl when he's approached by another parent. She says to him, "Oh, what a darling little girl you have there." The pedophile replies, "No," then points his finger to a child across the room and says, "That's my child."
Where do pedophiles go hunting?
Elementary schools.
What is a pedophile's favorite job?
The mall santa.
Why is it so hard to choose between buying a Subaru or a Volvo? Because you’re deciding whether you want to look like a rapist or a pedophile.