Name

daddyofjokes

Once upon a time, there was a magician named Daniel. He usually did gigs for children and this time he was working at a kid’s birthday party. He walked in and said “Hi boys and girls, my name is Daniel.” He performed multiple tricks, each one amazing the children. Then, he said “And for my final trick; I will disappear!” He lifted up a blanket and when it fell down he was gone. Then, the birthday boy said “Hey, he’s like my dad.” “Really” asked a little girl? “I guessed?” he said back, “My dad wasn’t a magician, but he disappeared. I haven’t seen him since…”

Watch

anonamoose

how do you start a dance party? go into the PTSD ward of an insane asylum and set off fireworks and watch the magic unfold

Die

Ray the morbid dood

When I die, I want to be shot out of a cannon…

And into a children’s birthday party.

Beer

Anonymous

Why do they never serve beer at a math party? - Because you can’t drink and derive.

Cow

David Unwin

A cow is at his friend’s house for a sleepover party. Sadly, all of the beds are taken. Where does the cow sleep?

On the COWch (couch)

Puns

Anonymous

What did the panther say at the poker party? I’d be lion if I said I was a cheetah.

Puns

Nika

Yesterday I went to a lightbulb party.and it was lit

Teacher

Butters Stotch

What did the math teacher write on his party invitations? Be there or B²

Tree

Daniel King

What did the tree wear to the pool party 🥳?

Swimming trunks.

Die

Anonymous

(Jokes for people with cancer) 1: I wish my cancer could kill me quicker so I don’t have to do this class anymore. 2: I’m dying, finally. 3: I’m sorry, I can’t go to your party because I’m expected to be dead by then. On a serious note, I might actually have cancer and I’m getting checks. I hope for the best :/.

Mouth

P...star

There is a party in my mouth and your dick is invited

Darkness

vlad 4.0 (the return)

I love Muslims, they are great at parties! They have the best fireworks.

Puns

0xFFA715

I walked into the party and the host asked me if I would like a slice of pie. I responded “yes” and he said: “okay, 14159”

Puns

Mr.Cringe

Why is it so hard to make a party on earth? Because you need to Planet.

Skeleton

Anonymous

Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party : He had nobody to go with

Thought

Will de lad

I once auditioned to be in sausage party. I thought I filled the role well.

Kid

Anonymous

Boy- your momma so ugly she’s denied from the homeless parties in the dumpster Quiet kid- your momma so funny she made a joke pop out her a*s

Difference

Ketchup

Q: How did the mobile phone propose to his girlfriend?

A: He gave her a ring.

Q: What’s the most popular video game at the bread bakery?

A: Knead for Speed.

Q: Why is Santa good at karate?

A: He has a black belt.

Q: Where do werewolves buy Christmas gifts?

A: Beast Buy.

Q: What did the snowflake say to the road?

A: Let’s stick together.

Q: Why did the turkey join a band?

A: So he could use his drumsticks.

Q: What’s a math teacher’s favorite winter sport?

A: Figure skating.

Q: Where do werewolves buy Christmas gifts?

A: Beast Buy.

Q: What did the snowflake say to the road?

A: Let’s stick together.

Q: Why did the turkey join a band?

A: So he could use his drumsticks.

Q: What’s a math teacher’s favorite winter sport?

A: Figure skating.

Q: What’s a firefly’s favorite dance?

A: The glitterbug.

Q: Why are eyeshadow, lipstick, and mascara never mad at each other?

A: Because they always make-up

via GIPHY

Q: Where do roses sleep at night?

A: In their flowerbed

Q: Why was the show bad at gymnastics?

A: She was a flip-flop

Q: What should you wear to a tea party?

A: A t-shirt

Q: What’s rain’s favorite accessory?

A: A rainbow

Q: Where does a sink go dancing?

A: The Dish-co

Q: What’s a princess’s favorite time?

A: Knight time.

Q: Why did the Genie get mad?

A: Because he was rubbed the wrong way.

Q: What’s a ballerina’s favorite type of bread?

A: A bun.

Q: What kind of dance was the frog prince best at?

A: Hip hop.

Q: What do bunnies like to do at the mall?

A: Shop ‘til they hop.

via GIPHY

Q: How did the beauty school student do on her manicure test?

A: She nailed it.

Q: What is corn’s favorite music?

A: Pop.

Q: Why can’t Monday lift Saturday?

A: It’s a weak day.

Q: Why was the politician out of breath?

A: He was running for office.

Q: What is a soccer player’s favorite chemical element?

A: Goooooooooooold!

Q: Why did the fastest cat in class get kicked out of school?

A: He was a cheetah.

Q: Which state has the greatest number of jokes?

A: Pennsylvania.

Q: Where is the best place to sit when a submarine is diving?

A: Inside.

Q: Why did the lawyer show up in court in his underwear?

A: He forgot his lawsuit.

Q: Why was the teenager no longer allowed online without a license?

A: He crashed the computer

via GIPHY

Q: What’s a ball that you don’t throw, shoot, eat, spit, bounce, or catch?

A: An eyeball.

Q: What do turtles, eggs, and beaches all have?

A: Shells.

Q: What time of year do people get injured the most?

A: In the fall.

Q: Why did the quarterback take the hardest classes?

A: Because he knew he would pass.

Q: Why did the musician throw away her table?

A: Because it was flat.

Q: Why didn’t the farmer’s son study medicine?

A: Because he wanted to go into a different field?

Q: What is the math teacher’s favorite dessert?

A: Pi

Q: Why was the princess in the emergency r

Smoking

I'm gay

When the school shooter throws a smoke bomb into the classroom and the autistic kid thinks it’s a dance party.

Vegetable

Anonymous

What does the beet DJ say when he’s partying?

“Dance to the beet, y’all!”

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