Otherness jokes
Think about how many more girls we guys could get if we talked to them how we talk to other guys, like when they say, "Can I borrow a pencil?" You say, "You can borrow this hard wood dick."
What is the difference between the Twin Towers and the Leaning Tower of Pizza?
One held its balance, the other two fell.
Why did the chicken cross the road?...
To get to the other side.
What is the other word for an orphan?
Paren't.
How did the emo kid compliment the other emo kid? He said, "I like your cuts G."
How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles?
You nail its other hand to the floor.
Why did the emo step in front of a car? To get to the other side.
Hey, this is to orphans:
"Orphans are ugly. We need to know each other :D We need to date, cause ur hot and so am I and orphans rly are ugly!!!!"
What’s the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?
One wags its tail, and the other tags a whale!
Why does new pavement smell like butt?
In other words you can also call it asphalt.
Ass-phalt.
In other news, we are hearing of a nasty helicopter crash on the M4. Let's cross live to our eye-in-the-sky, Mark. Mark?
I went out to buy some camouflage shirts the other day. Couldn't find any.
Gwen, let's chat at night for about 1 hour! I want to get to know each other better!
P.S., it's Jake.
What did one ghost say to the other?
"Get a life!"
You: OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE ALL THE KRAP THEY HAVE BEEN THROUGH!
The other person: Who?
You aka answer: Your Butt cheeks.
My friend nearly drowned in her bowl of muesli the other day. She was pulled in by a strong "currant."
What did one bee say to the other bee?
"I love you, honey!"
What’s a foot on one end, a foot on the other end, and a foot in the middle?
A meter stick.
The other day my girlfriend asked me to hand her the red lipstick, so I handed her the dog.
What did the cow say to the other cow?
Moo you fine.