Otherness jokes
Why is football the gayest sport ever? Because it's just a bunch of sweaty men tackling each other.
You know why eggs can't tell jokes?
They crack each other up!
Gwen, let's chat at night for about 1 hour! I want to get to know each other better!
P.S., it's Jake.
What did one nut say to the other?
“Cashew later.”
What did one nut say to the other nut when it was chasing it?
“I’m gonna cashew!”
Memes
How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles?
You nail its other hand to the floor.
Why did the emo step in front of a car? To get to the other side.
My grief counselor died the other day.
He was so good at his job, I don't even care.
What did one nut say to the other nut? "The guy in the middle's a dick!"
My friend nearly drowned in her bowl of muesli the other day. She was pulled in by a strong "currant."
What did one bee say to the other bee?
"I love you, honey!"
Why does new pavement smell like butt?
In other words you can also call it asphalt.
Ass-phalt.
What’s a foot on one end, a foot on the other end, and a foot in the middle?
A meter stick.
In other news, we are hearing of a nasty helicopter crash on the M4. Let's cross live to our eye-in-the-sky, Mark. Mark?
I went out to buy some camouflage shirts the other day. Couldn't find any.
What did one ghost say to the other?
"Get a life!"
Hey, this is to orphans:
"Orphans are ugly. We need to know each other :D We need to date, cause ur hot and so am I and orphans rly are ugly!!!!"
What’s the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?
One wags its tail, and the other tags a whale!
You: OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE ALL THE KRAP THEY HAVE BEEN THROUGH!
The other person: Who?
You aka answer: Your Butt cheeks.
What did the cow say to the other cow?
Moo you fine.