Otherness jokes

What's the difference between an orphan and a watermelon?

One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer; the other one is just an orphan.

What did one nut say to the other nut? "The guy in the middle's a dick!"

So I found out a rainbow is basically where a guy ejaculates in a female's mouth and she swallows her period juice and they both kiss each other, swishing it together in each other's mouth, and it forms a rainbow.

And a strawberry shortcake is basically where a dude ejaculates on a female's face and then punches her in the nose, causing her to bleed. That's why it's called a strawberry shortcake.

The cannibal says to the other cannibal, "I like it when humans fall from the sky because then they are meateor."

Some boy says 100000 digits of pi, and this other dude can't even remember the 1st one.

Three men are on a bench in Soviet Russia talking shit about Stalin. One of the men all of a sudden pulls out a KGB badge and says, "You two are coming with me for treason." One of the other men also pulls out a badge and says, "Not me." The third man pulls out a badge and says, "Wow? There's a lot of agents here."

My grief counselor died the other day.

He was so good at his job, I don't even care.

Yo momma's so ugly that she made One Direction turn into the Other Directions.

What’s the difference between an orphan and a watermelon?

One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer, and the other one is just a watermelon.

Teacher makes 1 kid recite the ABCs and the other count to 10.

Teacher: You can kill 2 birds with 1 stone.

Little Johnny goes home and throws a rock at two birds. One dies. He gives his dad a concussion from the rock hitting his head.

Johnny at school: You can kill a bird and give a man a concussion.

Two friends are arguing and one friend says, "Jason Warhis is not afraid of water and not ifs, ands, or buts about it."

And the other friend says, "Butt he is."

What did one butthole say to the other?

"I don't know WHAT got into me last night!"

Last week, I was on a plane to Manchester when suddenly the plane was hit by a ball. I wondered where it came from, but I soon realized it was none other than Penaldo practicing his free kicks. Shame on you, Penaldo, for almost killing me!

Q: What did one dead hooker say to the other dead hooker?

A: Nothing, dead hookers don't talk.

What did the traffic light say to the other?

"Hey, stop looking at me! I'm changing!"

If you argued that God was a woman, 49.8% of the US population would try and raise Hell.

Just to ask the other guy.

Talk about a male supremacist religion.