One jokes

There once was a boy named Sammy who loved this girl beyond belief. Her name was Rayne, but she didn’t notice him and or talk to him, but one day she did, and the ended up liking each other and getting married and living happil- wait no, that’s not right. Sammy actually snuck in Rayne's house one day and kidnapped her and locked her in his basement and made her into a puppet so he could keep her forever and ever. The End.

If a baby cow finds a wolf pup, they will be best friends, but when mummy wolf comes, it’s a fight, so the baby cow and the wolf pup made it a secret, but one day the mummy cow and the mummy wolf found out, but no one got hurt. In fact, the mummy cow and the mummy wolf got to know each other, and baby cow and wolf pup were very happy and played all day long. Their friendship will never break.

-THE END-

This was not a joke but a meaning: if you are different, that doesn’t change who you are and your friends are, so be yourself and don’t let people break your dreams, and don’t forget them either. So no matter who you are, don’t let people change who you are. 🐺🐮

Hi guys, so today I am going to do another blog. It's just for fun, and yeah. Enjoy!

So, this morning, when I woke up, I heard that I was getting new grips. I was so excited. (In case you guys don't know what grips are, they are sort of like gloves that go on your hands and they are for gymnastics bars.) I was excited because my old grips don't fit me anymore and my coach was like, "Oh I can get you some new ones since we have a meet in a week." And so I was like, "Oh, that's fine. My parents ordered me some. Thank you though." And she was like, "Okay, that's fine. Just make sure you have them by next week." So long story short, I have new grips now.

One night I was sitting on my bed in my room, minding my own business. It was pretty late, around 10 PM. The glow of my laptop screen was the only light in the room. I heard a noise coming from behind me. It sounded like the door was opening, but there was no one else in the house.

I turned around and found Mr. Incredible standing in my doorway, a stern look on his face. He walked over to me, slowly and dramatically. Then he leaned over and pointed his finger at my face, only about two inches away now. I was frozen with my back against the wall. Then, Mr. Incredible said something I would never forget: "Stop pirating video games."

Ever since that day, I have never gone on a pirating website and have paid legally for my video games. True story.

All these oranges, but you're still the one for me.

Dark Jokes R Like Puppies:

Once they come out they are trash, but once it starts to get older, that’s when it’s noticed, but when it gets too old, you either proclaim it dead or never talk about it.

(I would never do that though I love puppies)

What is 1 + 1?

They didn’t tell me. Their stomach is upset.

Lenda: Hey, can you help me with my homework, please?!

Genda: Okay, and if I do, you won't make a fuss about it!

Lenda: I'll try!

3 mins later.

Genda: THAT IS NOT THE RIGHT ANSWER!

Lenda: Then what is 90 million?

Genda: WHA WHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lenda mocking her: WHA OH YEAH YOU ARE A TERRIBLE TUTOR!!!!!!!!

4 mins later.

Genda: What is the capitol of watchington?

Lenda: Uh.....Idaho!

Genda being sarcastic: Yes...it is not the capitol of watchington...BECAUSE IT IS A STATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lenda: Oh, you mean Iowa!

Genda: UHHHHHHHHHHHH CUSS WORD!!!!!!!!!!

Lenda: U can't help that I'm the smart one...okay sweetie now you go be dumb and I go be smart! LATER SISTER! Oh wait, can you help me with my homework?

Genda: NO! You the smart one so you do it!

I always talk to my taco before I eat it.

One time it said it was having a bad day and I asked what's wrong. He said I don't want to taco 'bout it!

One hot day a cow wanted some shade.

He found a tree and started resting under it, but there was a chicken bothering him. The cow exclaimed, "Moooove!" The chicken didn't move. Again, "Moooove!" and still the chicken wouldn't move. The cow yelled, "MOOOOOVE!" The chicken turned around and said, "FUCKOFF."

If a person walks off a hundred-foot cliff and halfway down screams, "Why did I do that?" Then a second person walks off the same one-hundred-foot cliff and screams the same verse, "Why did I do that?" Then another person walks off the cliff and screams the same line, "Why did I do that," and the next person does the same thing. What do you call that?

(Stupid People)

Two to the one from the one to the three, I like good pussy and I like good trees, Smoke so much weed you wouldn't believe, And I get more ass than a toilet seat.

Three to the one from the one to the three, I met a bad bitch last night in the D, Let me tell you how I made her leave with me, Conversation and Hennessey.

I've been to the motherfuckin' mountain top, Heard motherfuckers talk, seen and dropped, If I ain't got a weapon I'ma pick up a rock, And when I bust yo ass I'ma continue to rock.

Getcha ass of the wall with your two left feet, It's real easy just follow the beat, Don't let that fine girl pass you by, Look real close 'cause strobe lights blind.

FREE MY ÑIGGA EDP HE INNOCENT ONCE UPON A TIME I WENT OVER TO HIS HOUSE AND HE FARTED SO GAHDAMN MUCH INTO MY MOUTH THAT I STARTED DROOLING A HERSHEY WATERFALL THIS ÑIGGA IS SO SEXY AND I LOVE WHEN HE SITS HIS FAT ASS ON TOP OF ME TYSON U JUST JEALOUS YOU AIN’T GOT NO ONE LIKE BRYANT U RETARDED LOOKING ASS BITCH I DARE YOU TO GET A PARTNER AS LOYAL AND INNOCENT AS EDP FREE MY ÑIGGA BIG HOMIE CHEESE HEAD 474747 HE INNOCENT.

Why can't orphans see their parents?

Because they don't have one!

What’s the difference between a teenage girl and a cat? One’s a psycho and the other is a cat.

A farmer has 3 fat ugly cows. One is named Xia. The next is named Chiang. What's the third?

Yu.

Why are orphans gay? Because they can’t come out to anyone.

I know why nobody likes my comments, because they got no sense of humor. That's why they dislike it. Now I know depression is a joke, a joke that never gets a laugh. =[ WHYYYY NO ONE LAUGH AT MY JOKES?

Why does a kid yell, "Shit?"

Because he had to take one.

My grandfather loves Hitler. They both had one ball.