One jokes

He’s so short no one can see you very close by.

One time I broke a leg and I was using a wheelchair.

My parents thought I was a disappointment and put me up on eBay, the Ohioan Black Market, and the nearest adoption center.

One time I was playing a bongo at a Chinese restaurant.

But they were competing against a Cuban restaurant and killed me.

One time, I worked at the zoo and I was feeding the monkeys.

And one of them μяɨɲąţ€ď on me.

And I went to the hospital and got a bloody nose the next day.

Why can't men play baseball?

Because no one can take the word "balls" seriously anymore.

I got fired from the bowling ball factory for throwing out the ones that had holes in them.

This year the London marathon was run on your hairline. It was so far back no one could complete it!

What’s the difference between a photocopier and the flu?

One makes facsimiles; the other makes sick families.

This town ain't big enough for the one of you.

Just looking for a cunt...

Oh hello, found one.

What's the difference between taking a shit and the Ottawa police force?

Usually taking a shit only requires one ass wipe!

Once I got one so big, they were going to make 9/11 2.0!

Yo mama's so fat, people think she only has one side!

My science teacher was talking about natural selection.

At one point, she asked me to name the first person to theorize about it. I said, "Eric Harris." It was on his shirt.

If you don't get the joke, look up "Eric Harris natural selection."

What's the difference between Rorochan and skydivers?

One does it for the cash, the other for the views.

Anyone remember the following?

You're so fat, you went on a scale and it said, "One at a time."

One of my friends got a haircut, and everyone giggled and bullied him... I didn’t, I died of laughter 😂

Did you hear about that one guy who dipped his balls in paint?

My friend said they were “Pretty nuts!”

So, one day Kylin Banks was playing football. Then he saw Violet. After he saw her, he got bricked up. Then he ran after her and rubbed his pickle all over her. She was so happy.