One jokes
If you think no one cares about you, stop paying your taxes.
Q: What did one atom say to the other?
A: I have my ion you.
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N. Oh my gosh, I'm peeing on my shoe, no one knows about it yet!
Luigi was dying and had two sons. Bruno was handsome, but Alberto was ugly.
He said, "Maria, tell me, is Alberto my son?"
"Yes, Luigi," his wife said, and he died happily.
Wife said, "Thank God he didn’t ask about the other one!"
Julius Caesar walks into a bar and orders a Martinus.
The bartender asks, "Don't you mean Martini?"
Julius Caesar says, "No, I only want one."
Roses are red, violets are blue, keep being you, let no one discourage you.
So, my mom looked in the mirror today, and we need a new one.
What can't play home in baseball? They don't have one.
Why did no one turn up to John's funeral?
Because Sally wrote the invitations!
Why do I look nervous when I enter the church? Is it just because I'm the only one with the bomb?
I wrote puns on a piece of paper like this:
P. P. P. P. U. U. U. U. N. N. N. N. S. S. S. S.
Then I showed them to my teacher, asking him what they had in common.
“They are all very tearable,” he replied.
Well, there is one person who gets it!
I cannot believe no one's come up with a cure for anorexia yet. I thought it would be a piece of cake!
Worst jokes ever? More like I killed an old man in 2012 in Oklahoma City at that nasty Red Lobster, not the one near the freeway, and hid the body in a creek!
My Dad pays a lot of attention to our household and has always had a good eye for detail. He was the one that first noticed that my mother and I have the same ring size.
One day every kid at the orphanage got coal for Christmas. It was the second worst day of their lives.
Am tired of my country!!!! How can two policemen use one gun?
Teacher: What’s the closest planet?
Kids yell: Sun.
Except for one.
Other kid: Uranus.
Teacher: Uranus?
Other kid: Yeah, it’s right there.
Everyone has a good heart; they just don't know what to do with it. I say give someone some love. Hate is sooooo stupid. Love is soooo smart!
Who would win?
The laws of the Catholic Church which have been effective for over 900 years,
Or one horny Henry?
Beast joke ever: my life... Oh wait, I don't have one.