Old jokes

What is the best thing about an 18-year-old girl in the shower?

Slick her hair, she looks 15.

I found Jeffrey Epstein’s diary the other day.

The last entry was about 12 years old.

My 1 year old nephew had a stroke. I know, sounds bad... but he would have needed to learn how to speak and walk anyways.

One time Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction from eating 12-year-old nuts.

What’s big, pink, long and makes my 12 year old girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth?

Her miscarriage.

Jokes are like your grandparents, old and dead.

How old are 9/11 victims?

"There, toddlers, here come the airplane!"

Did you hear the news? Michael Jackson died because he choked on 7-year-old nuts and balls.

What's Michael Jackson's favorite toy?

Wet 6-year-old balls.

You know what, I'm done. We are banning "your mom" jokes. They're old, weird, and have been done thousands of times. Just like your mom.

What did the pretty young pre-pubescent 14 year old boy say when he got a homosexual pedophile for Christmas?

He said he was awfully touched!

Never hide something behind a bookshelf. It's the oldest trick in the book!

Did you hear about the baby with cancer? It never gets old.

Vegan is actually an old Indian word for "bad hunter."

Michael Jackson is happy when there are twenty-eight-year-olds.

Quit making those progeria jokes. They get old very quickly.

Yo mama so old that her breastmilk was powdered. You breastfeed like this 🌬💨.

Did you know that, statistically, 1 in 10 people live next door to a pedophile? Not me though, not me though; I live next door to a lil 10 year old boy with a FAT ASS yenno what I'm sayin'???

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 murdered 37 children and 41 adults during the ages of 31-35 years old.

She was then sentenced to a 35 year sentence (Colombian stuff) and came out 70 years old. She then continued to go on a spree and murder 41 more people, in 2 months. 3 years later, 6 stabbed 7 as they were friends. 6 was not sentenced, but deemed a hero. He never forgets that moment. Her soul not floating above, but screaming from the torture it's receiving.

An old professor’s class used to begin with a dirty joke.

Following one particularly vulgar joke, the girls in the class decided to walk out the next time he began.

When the professor learned of this planned protest, he came in the next morning and said, “Good morning, class. Did you hear about the scarcity of whores in Newfoundland?”

With that, all the women stood up and headed for the door.

“Wait, ladies,” called the professor, “The boat doesn’t leave until tomorrow!”