Ocean jokes
What did the fish say to the beach?
"Long tide, no see!"
People in 1912: The Titanic is unsinkable!
Iceberg: Hold my beer.
Guys, I'm back...
Here's my joke:
What is blue and red all over?
Blood in the water of a shark attack victim.
Q: What did the ocean say to the boy?
A: Nothing! Oceans don't talk, silly!
Imagine if hitting the iceberg wasn't an accident and it was all just the sailors' fault like this:
Sailor 1: Hey Ron. Sailor 2: Yeah? Sailor 1: You see that iceberg over there? Sailor 2: Yeah. Sailor 1: You know what would be pretty funny?
What did the Titanic say while sinking?
"It's going down."
What type of fish goes best with peanut butter?
Jellyfish!
Yo mama so fat, she was the iceberg that sank the Titanic.
Once i was walking along the beach and there was a girl with no arms or legs there, i walked by and she said excuse me, will you touch me ive never been touched before, i was like okay so i touched her, i kept on walking along and there was the same girl, she said sir will you kiss me, i went alright so i went up and kissed her, i thought that was weird but anyway i kept walking along and there she was again, she said sir will you fuck me? I went okay so i picked her up and threw her in the ocean and went YOUR FUCKED NOW
Yo mama so fat, she has to bathe in the Pacific Ocean.
Your mama is so fat, she sunk Atlantis even though it's in the ocean!
Spongebob's teeth upside down is the twin towers.
Spongebob: 9 letters
Squarepants: 11 letters
Spongebob did 9/11.
Why do pirates say, "Argh my Hardees?"
Because that's how you tell when they have the hards.
What did the other wave say to the other wave?
"Nothing, they just waved!"
What do you call a dolphin in the woods? Dead.
What did the shark say when he ate the clownfish?
"This tastes a little funny."
My wife said, "Why oh why have you ordered carpet, our house is lovely?"
Thankfully the carpet was put to good use in the end, no more stupid comments coming from a rolled up Emily in the bottom of the ocean!
A shark can swim faster than me, but I can run faster than a shark.
So in a triathlon, it would all come down to whoever can ride a bike the fastest.
The fish do nothing. That is definitely a bad joke.
Me: Hey, do you live in the ocean?
Random guy: Why?
Me: Because you look like a whale.