Obsession jokes
Are you a knife? Because I want you.
What do Donald Trump and a dick have in common?
Liberals can't keep either one out of their mouths.
Hi, my name is Crappy. I like tacos and more tacos and more tacos and more tacos and more tacos and more tacos and ya now GET LOST!
JFK: Are you a bullet? Because I can't get you out of my head.
I diddled for a total of 67 times. I am the ultra Gooner. My cum is everywhere. I am the goon master.
Harry Potter is a movie about a grown adult man with an unhealthy obsession with a teenage boy.
You are so fat you tried to eat the word "edible."
Just to get things straight, I'm NOT, I repeat, NOT racist, but this joke goes out to all the people who talk about other people with darker skin than the other person.
Bully: Your skin is so black and ugly (for the 5th time).
Me: I'm so happy you love my skin color!
Bully: Ew, no I don't!
Me: Then why do you keep talking about it?
Are you a bullet? 'Cause you're stuck in my head.
More about Quinn: He loves Robin. He loves his tight ass. He licks up all his shit after Taco Bell.
Thomas Montgomery would eat his fillet of fish in bed every night. He had fillet of fish bedding and everything. His roommates always asked him, "Why are you eating your fillet of fish in bed?" He wouldn't reply.
His family took him to the best psychologist in the field. Thomas continued emptying his bank account on fillet of fish to eat in bed. His friend said one day, took a picture of Thomas and told him to say cheese. They laughed and went there separate ways. Then in bed that night, Thomas kept on thinking to himself, "I never said cheese before someone snapped my picture." He repeated it again. The next day he thanked his friend, "Fillet in him feel better."
A friend of mine says "Baguette" all the time cuz she is French.
I can't stop thinking about those beans.
I was working in an iPhone store in Norwich when a man came! He said, "Give me a hat-trick or I will destroy your store!" I said, "No," and he started to smash phones! I immediately screamed, "Important game!" and he disappeared! Shame on you, Penaldo, for ruining my store! 😡😡
I have had an obsession with soap. Don’t worry, I am all clean now!
My wife and children are leaving me over my obsession with horse racing.
And they're off!
Geowipp Grand Prize. And the CHOICE OF FOOD IS INSANE. We love him and we love him.
August is a guy from one of the shops, and we became a sundwich durk through Habin. We have GOT GO GO, IT WAS GRAT. That's why. But we don't do everything.
You: Say "addicted" after everything I say.
Person: Uh okay.
You: When you're obsessed with candy you are...?
Person: Addicted.
You: When you're obsessed with drugs you are...?
Person: Addicted.
You: What hit you in the face last night?
Person: Addicted... *laughs*
(It's supposed to sound like "A dick did")
Are you suicide? Because you are always on my mind.
My girlfriend left me because of my obsession with pasta. -- I'm doing well, but I do get cannelloni.