Obsession jokes

I just broke up with my mathematician girlfriend. She was obsessed with an X.

Harry Potter is a movie about a grown adult man with an unhealthy obsession with a teenage boy.

Is your name suicide because I think about you all the time?

Are you a knife? Because I want you.

My wife and children are leaving me over my obsession with horse racing.

And they're off!

I know this isn't about glue, but here's one:

Cardi B had a sister who was obsessed with fitness. Her name? Cardi O.

I like big butts in the Kent, la la "hehehe" SUS.

I was working in an iPhone store in Norwich when a man came! He said, "Give me a hat-trick or I will destroy your store!" I said, "No," and he started to smash phones! I immediately screamed, "Important game!" and he disappeared! Shame on you, Penaldo, for ruining my store! 😡😡

Are you suicide? Because you are always on my mind.

Thomas Montgomery would eat his fillet of fish in bed every night. He had fillet of fish bedding and everything. His roommates always asked him, "Why are you eating your fillet of fish in bed?" He wouldn't reply.

His family took him to the best psychologist in the field. Thomas continued emptying his bank account on fillet of fish to eat in bed. His friend said one day, took a picture of Thomas and told him to say cheese. They laughed and went there separate ways. Then in bed that night, Thomas kept on thinking to himself, "I never said cheese before someone snapped my picture." He repeated it again. The next day he thanked his friend, "Fillet in him feel better."

Are you a bullet? 'Cause you're stuck in my head.

More about Quinn: He loves Robin. He loves his tight ass. He licks up all his shit after Taco Bell.

My girlfriend has a huge crush on Jupiter, I mean she fell HARD!

JFK: Are you a bullet? Because I can't get you out of my head.

I am sooooooo bored, Gwen, can you please get on, or anybody, since I'm weirdly obsessed with Gwen.

The definition of a stalker is two people going on a romantic walk, but only one person knows about it.

"Prince, why that girl, not me! What about me!!!!!!!"

Are you having rabbit and duck for dinner?

Yeah.

Why?

Because I got too obsessed with hares.

What is the difference between shroud and a shroud imposter?

Shroud uses reddit, and the imposter uses WJE.

Reddit king and q, I really dgaf what you say, you guys are practically obsessed with me cuz ur leaving hate comments on almost all my jokes, so stop. You're obviously gonna look bad if you just insult meh jokes.

If you guys dont like my jokes, you can just dislike and not leave a comment, ok?

I have had an obsession with soap. Don’t worry, I am all clean now!