What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline.
What did the rope say to me?
"Hey there man, you wanna hang later?"
How do you fit 4 gay dudes on a stool?
Flip it upside down.
What is the difference between a light bulb and a pregnant woman?
You can unscrew a light bulb.
2 weeks here.
What do dicks and popsicles have in common?
They both like to be sucked on, and they sometimes choke you.
I'm doing a new thing where you say an object in the comments, and i will try to make a joke based off the object.
If you are interested, you can submit an object in the comments.
I will give the person credit each joke i do.
What's the difference between a child and a book?
One doesn't scream when you snap its neck.
What hit the ground first, the feather or the depressed kid?
The feather, the rope was stopping the kid.
What's red and really bad for your teeth? A brick.
What is long, brown, and cures depression?
A noose.
What falls and never gets hurt? Rain ☔️
What do you do when you finish a magazine at a hospital?
Reload and keep shooting.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
I love still things.
Why are lamps so scared? Because someone might throw them away.
You wanna know why I hate circles so much? They’re just so pointless! But I guess that’s how they roll.
How do you fit a hundred babies into a small bucket?
With a blender.
What do you call an hourglass with no sand in it?
A waist of time.
What do you call an arrow pointing the wrong way?
A Disap point ment.
what was sally's role in a football game?
the football ;-;
