Plug jokes

What did the plug hole say to the plug? "We are so in sync."

I was pretty tight friends with my butt plug. But then we had a falling-out.

Are you a toaster?

'Cause I wanna take a bath with you.

I went to see my grandfather in the hospital because I wanted to get to know him better before he passed, maybe take a selfie with him. But when I got there my phone died, so I unplugged a vacuum to plug in my phone. And it turns out he only knows Spanish, so when he kept saying, "Me desconectaste el soporte de mi vida," I thought he wanted water. But when I got back with the water he was asleep, and now my phone was charged, so I translated what he said. And it was, "You unplugged my life support." That's when I called the doctor...

Good news is, I got one sick selfie!

Why did Stephen Hawking die?

Because he forgot to plug in the charger.

A computer is like a living organism. Its charger is its life support. If you "pull the plug," you are letting it slowly die.

The fact that I am high won't stop me from advising you.

Don't plug your phone while charging it; it is very dangerous.

Why did Stephen Hawking die?

He drove too far away from the wall and got unplugged.

What does a plug do when he's horny?

He jacks off!

An HDMI cable and an electrical outlet went on a date. It didn't go well, because they couldn't connect.

What does a blind man crying and an unplugged TV have in common?

Nothing can be seen when they get turned on.

When you unplug the charger to charge your phone, but you realize it was plugged into your grandpa's life support:

Yo Father, don't use the baptism bath. I cleaned my anal plug in there.

What?

The holy water gets all the ass off. Don't mind the white stuff. *clears throat*

Stephen Hawking tried to charge his phone and unplugged his life support.

When I shit in the toilet, I think that if I shit hard enough, I can see my asshole plug.

"Did you guys make sure Stephen was plugged in?"

Why do men get great ideas in bed?

'Cause they are plugged into a genius!

A Make-A-Wish patient wanted to see Black Panther IRL, so I pulled his plug.

🎵 BEAVER BEAVER 🎵

LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA

I'm walking down the street with a bag of dildos, beryllium, and a butt plug.

I was going to charge my phone, so I pulled a plug and put it in. Then, my grandpa wasn't breathing anymore.