Plug

Plug Jokes

Hospital

I went to see my grandfather in the hospital because I wanted to get to know him better before he passed, maybe take a selfie with him. But when I got there my phone died, so I unplugged a vacuum to plug in my phone. And it turns out he only knows Spanish, so when he kept saying, "Me desconectaste el soporte de mi vida," I thought he wanted water. But when I got back with the water he was asleep, and now my phone was charged, so I translated what he said. And it was, "You unplugged my life support." That's when I called the doctor...

Good news is, I got one sick selfie!

Death

Why did Stephen Hawking die?

Because he forgot to plug in the charger.

Phone

The fact that I am high won't stop me from advising you.

Don't plug your phone while charging it; it is very dangerous.

Computer

A computer is like a living organism. Its charger is its life support. If you "pull the plug," you are letting it slowly die.

Cable

An HDMI cable and an electrical outlet went on a date. It didn't go well, because they couldn't connect.

Life Support

When you unplug the charger to charge your phone, but you realize it was plugged into your grandpa's life support:

TV

What does a blind man crying and an unplugged TV have in common?

Nothing can be seen when they get turned on.

Father

Yo Father, don't use the baptism bath. I cleaned my anal plug in there.

What?

The holy water gets all the ass off. Don't mind the white stuff. *clears throat*

Phone

Stephen Hawking tried to charge his phone and unplugged his life support.

Shit

When I shit in the toilet, I think that if I shit hard enough, I can see my asshole plug.

Patient

A Make-A-Wish patient wanted to see Black Panther IRL, so I pulled his plug.

Man

Why do men get great ideas in bed?

'Cause they are plugged into a genius!

Bag

🎵 BEAVER BEAVER 🎵

LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA

I'm walking down the street with a bag of dildos, beryllium, and a butt plug.

Butt Plug

Butt plug, oh butt plug, get out of me.

Butt plug, oh butt plug, get in my mouth, oh how I wanna taste you.

Oh, butt plug, oh butt plug, something is nutty.