Nut jokes
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Peanut. Peanut who? Peanut butter open the door!
Reese's.
Reese's who? Re-sees with deez nuts!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Dragon.
Dragon deez nuts.
Dragon deez nuts who?
DRAGON DEEZ NUTS ALL OVER YOUR FACE!
Thing 1: What's the difference between nuts and almonds?
Thing 2: I don't know, what?
Thing 1: One gets hard faster.
What's the artist imagine something?
Imagine Dragons!
Imagine draggin' these nuts across your face!
Memes
My girlfriend's name is Candice.
Can these nuts fit in your mouth? :D
The moment when you throw the nut away and try to eat the shell.
When you throw your peanut butter sandwich at the nut allergy table: 25+ kill streak!
How do you say “Yes, you look good” in Spanish?
– Sí...
See deez nuts!
Are you going to SHOWCON?
What’s SHOWCON?
Show con these nuts.
Have you heard of the Xbox game Sea of Thieves?
See if these nuts fit in your mouth.
How many times do you nut? It depends how hard you do it.
I love my family.
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?
Hold on to your nuts; this ain’t no ordinary blow job.
What’s a nut’s favorite scary movie?
The Creature from the Black Legume.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Butter. Butter who? I butter not tell you.
What’s a nut’s favorite Shakespeare line?
“To be or nut to be.”
What sandwich spread makes people itch?
Flea-nut butter.
I had fresh coconut the last time I went to Hawaii. It’s a tough nut to crack.
You pecan do it!