Nut

Nut jokes

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Me: How do cowboys say hello?

Friend: Howdy.

Me: How do deez nuts fit in your mouth?

Me: What are we doing in HPE?

Friend: Fitness.

Me: Fitting deez nuts in your mouth.

Me: What's the fifth month of the year?

Friend: May.

Me: May deez nuts fit in your mouth?

I suck his dick with a smile for hours at a time.

Stare at his nutsack while I hold back my cum tonight.

And when he ask me what position I say, "Doggystyle." (And when they ask me what position I say, "Doggystyle.")

But the fact is I can never get off of his fat dick. And all that they can ask is (Ask is, ask is) "I just wanna smack it" (I just wanna smack it)

Here's what the fact is He can put my asshole in a casket (Yuh, yuh, yuh) Asshole in a casket

So you can see I'm cummin' But you won't see me nut. And I'll just keep on suckin', I'm good (Yeah, I'm good)

And if he sucks my glizzy I will become dizzy But it keeps us busy, I'm good (Yeah, I'm good)

I've been twerking for boys for so long I've been flirting with boys for so long

My jaw's been hurting for so, so long it's real So long, it's real, so long, it's real

I went to the super market one day and I saw a Caesar salad for 69 dollars. Next minute someone comes up to me and says, "Caesar deez nutz!"

How have you been recently?

Oh, just playing some Rhydon.

What’s Rhydon?

Rhydon deez nutz!

They say during sex you burn off as many calories as running 8 miles. Who the fuck runs 8 miles in 30 seconds?

Me: Do you like smash?

Friend: Smash Rolls?

Me: No, Smash DEEZ NUTS!

Friend: AHHHHH (*moans)

Did you hear they think Michael Jackson died from food poisoning? He ate 12-year-old nuts and a 13-year-old wiener.

*at school*

Nobody: Do you want nuts?

Me: Wait, you have some?

Nobody: Yeah, they're my own.

Me: :0

Dees was a squirrel who had big nuts.

Everybody loved dees big nuts.