Do you know how a snail has a "nail," why can't it be a nut?
I thought about going on an all-almond diet.
But that’s just nuts.
im bored in class anyone wanna chat
Who is Joe?
You reply back: Who is Candice?
They reply back: Who is Candice?
You say: "Candice nuts fit into Joe Mama's mouth."
A girl asked, "Can I have some nuts too?"
Boy: "Sure, what ones ;)"
What can happen if you bring a hooker into a stranger's house? He will ask you, "Really, are you nuts?"
What will happen if someone kicks you right in the balls?
You will be like, "Ow, my nuts!"
What are you willing to write in your notebook? These nuts.
I asked my doctor if it was normal for one of my nuts to be bigger than the other two.
Why does a very tall man allow dwarfs to take turns to suck his balls?
Because he is nuts about them!
What do you call a 3-sum with a girl with AIDS?
Nut in the butt.
I'm as bored as heck, someone wanna chat?
The popular girl told me, "I bet your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory!"
Two weeks later, she shows up pregnant.
...
I guess her rubber broke too.
Danny, your mum [is] dead as hell and got raggedy shoes on.
What happened to the police that crossed the road?
They solved a murder involving the nut case.
Cooper, your mum gay lol
Why are nuts on boys
A pirate walks into a tavern with a pirate ship attached to his nutty wuttys. It's driving me nuts!
A troll proceeds to pull out a desert eagle and shoot the pirate in the face. He makes a poggers face and says, "Problem??"
Brother: Your nuts!
Sister: What do you mean? You're the one that has the nuts!
Warning: If you're planning to look here for jokes about the FOOD nuts, don't bother. It's filled with penis jokes.
