Nut

Nut jokes

Guy

1 view ·

Can you guys comment on my nuts jokes (aka Willma, Bofa, and Savor)? I just want to see if people don't think it's funny.

Competition

5 views ·

Mr. Smith: Neona, tell us what you have for the biggest competition that we can do to keep our competitors out of the winning streak?

Neona: Will thought we used more sales and more advertising.

Mr. Smith: It's already a good idea. Now what about the business plan? We need it as recommendations to keep the business going. Tell me, what do you have in mind?

Neona: It is better to always have a plan. I was thinking that we can get higher prices and always get great deals. The people will go nuts for a great deal!

Mr. Smith: Perfect. Now let's take a 5 minute break.

Mr. Smith: Ok, 5 minutes is up! Now Neona, I know you are an intern, but what are the best things we can do for the company?

Neona: Hmm...let's see...will we can start with all the things people love! If this is going to work then we have have to......

Uncle

41 views ·

In school, we learned that squirrels stick their nuts in trees. So, just like my uncle Dave...

Man

31 views ·

What do you call physically handicapped, homophobic, heterosexual men and women in wheelchairs?

Mixed nuts.

Peanut

3 views ·

So I was in the lunch room and was sitting by the peanut allergic kids' table. I stood up and I threw an opened bag of peanuts at them and yelled, "25 kill streak!" 🤣😂

Man

2 views ·

This man came up to me and asked if I could sell my house to him, and I said sure. Then five days later, he said that the loan should come in the mailbox. Then I checked the mailbox, and the only thing I saw was nothing, so I told the guy, "DEEZ NUTS IN YOUR MOUTH!"

Mama

9 views ·

Who is Joe?

You reply back: Who is Candice?

They reply back: Who is Candice?

You say: "Candice nuts fit into Joe Mama's mouth."

Hooker

2 views ·

What can happen if you bring a hooker into a stranger's house? He will ask you, "Really, are you nuts?"