Not jokes
How did the orphan go to school?
Not by his parents.
POV: You're an orphan.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not your mom.
Stranger: Knock knock.
Orphan: Who's there?
Stranger: Not your parents.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your parents.
Everyone, if I am not online, that is because I am on a vacation, so yeah.
Hey, I’m not an alcoholic! I only drink 2 times a year. When it’s my Birthday, and when it’s not...
Comment on this if you are somewhat like me: depressed, single, gay, and act like you're not burning inside.
You need to play a B flat, not a C sharp, you just got band!
Stephen Hawking's not dead, he is just in airplane mode.
I have a daily routine where I take a crap every morning at 6 AM, but wake up at 7 AM. And it's not even a joke.
Why couldn't Stephen Hawking pass? Because he couldn't pass "I'm not a robot" test.
What do you say to an upset Down syndrome person?
I'd ask what's up, but it's definitely not you!
It’s not cheating if you’re all siblings.
Man: Doctor, where are you taking me?
Doctor: To the morgue.
Man: But I’m not dead yet.
Doctor: Are we there yet?
Boy goes to Confession.
Boy: "What are you doing, Father?"
Priest: "It's called masturbation, and soon you will be doing it."
Boy: "Why do you say that, Father?"
Priest: "'Cause my hand is getting tired!"
-not my joke
What did the mama moose say to the calf after it got on her nerves?
"I'm not a-moosed right now."
Yo mama so fat the scale said, "I need your weight, not your phone number."
My three favorite things are eating my family and not using commas.
I saw a fat woman at the bus stop today, so I asked her, "When's it due?"
She replied, "I'm not fucking pregnant, you rude prick!"
I said, "I meant the bus, you fat cunt!"
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your parents :) so kawaii fr.