Not jokes

Relationship

    • Tj if you don't stop trying to ruin Gwen and Prince's relationship then I will scream!!!!!!!!!!

    It's some dumb faker and what point of she just wants to be your friend do not understand!

    Suicide

    • So, I’m not sure if it’s a joke, but I thought it was funny. So imagine you try to die by shooting yourself, but you sneeze and pull the trigger... I don't know about you, but I would’ve been mad. Because wtf, I wasn’t readyyyy!

  • 5

    • Cunt

    • Ok, now I'm not good at telling jokes, but this one is not too bad. One cunt said to another cunt, "Do you get cold at night?"

    "Fuck no, cunt," the first cunt said, "Why?"

    "I have a built-in set of vertical curtains to keep the cold out, cunt!" xx

  • 2
    • Not memes

    Arsenic

    • A man walks into a pharmacy and asks the pharmacist, "May I have a bottle of arsenic, please?" She is shocked. "Why would you want something like that?" The man calmly tells her, "I want to poison my unfaithful wife and her lover." The pharmacist is now horrified. She said, "I can not possibly give you that. It is completely illegal and I would lose my license and be prosecuted for conspiracy and murder!" At this point the man hands the pharmacist a photo of his unfaithful wife having sex with the pharmacist's husband. She examines it then looks up at him. "Oh. I didn't know you had a prescription."

  • 0

    • Comeback

    • Bully: Hey virgin!

    Victim: I'm not a virgin, just ask your sister.

    Bully: I don't have a sister, dumbass.

    Victim: Just wait nine months.

  • 9

    • Orphan

    • My name is Mariah Carly Brown, and I am an orphan, and what do I say about your jokes that are not funny... STOP THEM!

    Dark humor is mean! All day I go to see all the jokes I find, and I see "Orphan jokes."

    What kind of sick person likes that kind of joke? By the way, it is not a question. I have 3 twin sisters! Lariah, Kariah, and Iariah! Iariah starts with an i! So stop the jokes, please!

    Phobia

    • Albert is a homophobic guy. His cousin Franco is also a homophobic guy.

    Albert's aunt and cousin have visited his parents, but Albert didn't know that because he came late at night. Franco was sleeping in Albert's bed, thinking he would not come home. Albert laid on his bed, thinking there was no one on it, and then they started fucking ^_*

    No phobia lasts forever 👌😂

  • 1

    • Comeback

    • An ugly, arrogant woman walked into a store with her 2 kids, yelling at them.

    The store clerk pleasantly said, "Good morning ma'am and welcome. Nice children, are they twins?"

    The ugly woman stopped yelling and said, "Hell no they are not, one is 9 and the other is 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just bloody stupid?"

    The clerk replied, "I'm neither blind nor stupid ma'am, I just can't believe someone would screw you twice."

  • 3

    • Sarcasm

    • I was talking to this absolutely gorgeous woman, and I asked her, “What do you do?” And she said, “I’m a brain surgeon.” And I don’t know if this makes me sexist or not, but I was really impressed.

    Most women can’t pull off sarcasm.

  • 3

    • Plate

    • Your mom: Your plate is full, that's enough food on your plate.

    Me: My plate is not full, I still see the white of the plate.

    Susie

    • Why did lil Susie fall off the swing? She didn’t have any arms.

    Knock, knock. Who’s there? Not lil Susie.

  • 1

    • Sister

    • Gina: Maryen? Karlya? Amber? Kristie? Why isn't it listed that she's here?

    Zari: Your sister isn't listed in the meantime, just relax.

    Gina: That still doesn't answer why she's not listed. I want her to see me!

    Zari: Anyway, it will be time for your medications, we have the gixen and the Uiasends.

    Gina: Do you know my sister's name?

    Zari: Yes. Her name is Jalien.

    Gina: Fine, I don't care!!!