New Jokes - Page 477 - Worst Jokes Ever

Your hairline is so bad man, I gave your doctor a breathalyzer.

Why did the Romans build straight roads? So the Pakis (bastards) didn't build corner shops.

Fat bully. That was just the starter, now do you want the main course?

Me: I don't think I want that because you already ate it.

A termite walks into a bar and says, "So, is the bartender here?"

The orphan tried to play baseball, but he couldn't get home because home doesn't exist for him.

Ernie and Burt were camping in the woods, when they woke up Burt asked Ernie "how did you sleep?" Ernie replied with "I slept amazing! I had a great dream that I was in a magic candy world and was sucking the most tastiest lollipop I'd ever tasted in my life."

Burt replied with "Good to hear, I slept amazing too. I had a dream that I was in heaven surrounded by angels, and one of them was giving me a blow job."

When you ask your brother where his hairline is, and he points where it's supposed to be, and you say, "I don't see one there."

What happens when a frog parks illegally?

He gets toad.

What’s the difference between autism and gender?

Gender is binary, autism is a spectrum.

I'm no astronomer, but I’m pretty sure the Earth revolves around the sun... not you.

Why was Tickle Me Elmo upset when he left the factory?

Because they only gave him one test tickle.

In my science class we were watching a video, and for no reason at all, it started talking about Black Lives Matter, and my friend leaned over and whispered, “White lives matter more!”

So Mungus.

What did the dog say to the cat? Ruff!

Why was the cookie angry? Because someone ate the chips!

What is the similarity between Hitler and orphans?

They both don't have parents.

What’s the difference between cancer and my abusive stepdad?

My stepdad did beat cancer.

Last post for today, but I had to say one more thing! Tomorrow I am going to Six Flags, and I am literally so excited! It is going to be so much fun. Hope you guys have a good MLK JR. day! Woohooo!