Worst Jokes Ever
Chuck Norris can make 5 minute frosting in 4 minutes.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone chucked a brick at her.
Why did Sally throw a clock out the window? She had brain damage from the brick.
And the lord said unto John, "Come forth and you will receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.
Why are white teenagers the best for the army? They are good at shooting things up.
How were tire swings made?
A tire said, "Goodbye world," and hung himself.
What do you call two Mexicans having sex? 50 Shades of Brown.
What did the Nazi order from Wendy's?
Two number NEINs.
When someone has an imaginary friend, you call them weird and crazy.
But when a group of people have an imaginary friend, you call it religion. :)
How many gay guys can you fit on a bar stool? Four, just flip it over.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how big they are and how hard you throw them.
What do you do with a frozen vegetable?
You wait for it to thaw.
"I told my kids not to spend all day at a computer, but then I realized I do that myself."
Why did the boy shoot the clock? He wanted to kill time.
Why did the boy shoot the clock?
What is a rabbit's favorite type of jewelry?
Carats.
So I was doing a puzzle, and I was getting triggered with it. My friend said, "It's puzzling why you're so triggered."
A man had 10 dead and bloody babies in the middle of his living room. The police suddenly knocked on his door. What is the hardest thing to hide?
- A boner.
What do you call a Catholic priest who molests children?
A Catholic priest.
What's red, green, and smells like shit?
... Red and green shit.
I'm straighter than a rainbow.