Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

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*bowl of dark grapes*

Friend 1: I like my grapes how I like my men.

Friend 2: Black? Good one.

Friend 1: 21 at a time.

The difference between women and beer is that beer makes you happy for nothing, why women make you angry for nothing.

Someone asked me if I was a good sleeper. I told them I'm so good that I can do it with my eyes closed.

Do you wanna hear the gossip about butter?

Actually, I shouldn't spread it.

If you were on the Titanic and you didn't leave the ship, what would you do? Just let that sink in.

  • 2

    • What's similar between a pregnant 14 y/o girl and the foetus inside of her?

    They both are thinking "My mom's gonna kill me!"

  • 2

    • A father of a young girl comes to meet the doctor.

    Father: Doctor, how is my daughter's report?

    Doctor: Congrats, your daughter is pregnant.

    Father: WTF ?????? My daughter is 10 years old and unmarried!

    A father of a young girl comes and meets the doctor.

    Father: Doctor, how is my daughter's report?

    Doctor: Congrats, your daughter is pregnant.

    Father: WTF ?????? My daughter is 10 years old and unmarried.

    Why did the little girl flush herself down the toilet?

    Because she wanted to join the Brownies.

    With a poke-poke here,

    And a poke-poke there,

    Here a poke, There a poke, everywhere a poke-poke!

    I was once caught doing it with a 16 year old in my bedroom. Boy, was my wife mad. She yelled "HOW CAN YOU F*** OUR DAUGHTER?!". Haha, yeah, she was mad.

    Anyways, that's why your mother and I are getting a divorce, Timmy.

  • 0

    • I put my fish on a leash so I could teach him to walk. Then I took him out for a walk. Then, when I put him back in the tank, he stopped moving.