Worst Jokes Ever
Why is the penis so light?
Because even thots can lift them.
What's Stephen Hawking's shampoo?
Head and Shoulders. 😊
What was the doctor's diagnosis on a dinosaur with a low sex drive? Teraerectile dysfunction.
Q: Why did the baby cross the road?
A: It wasn't in its car seat.
What kind of file turns a 1.5 cm hole into a 4.5 cm hole?
A pedophile.
Why do people eat bananas? Because it's a-peeling!
Today was a bad day. There was a man throwing butter and cheese at me, how dairy!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Water.
Water who?
Water you waiting for, just let me in!
What's the most between my uncle and aunt?
My aunt waited until I was 14 to come on my face.
If you are American in the living room, what are you in the bathroom?
Euro-peein'.
Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?
To get to the bottom.
Any joke can be funny with the right delivery, except abortion jokes, because then there is no delivery.
Braille is not that hard to learn, you just got to have a feel for it.
Where is the worst place to lock your keys in your car?
The anti-abortion clinic because you have to go back in and ask for a coat hanger.
What's the difference between a cow and a pig?
One is a pig.
Why did the man with no arms fall off his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him.
What's meaner than taking candy from a baby?
Throwing the baby off a cliff.
What does a duck and a tablespoon have in common?
Both are not a lamp.
A penguin walks into a bar. The bartender says, "So what will it be this time?" The penguin doesn't answer because it's a penguin.
Why is six afraid of seven?
Because seven is a registered sex offender.