Worst Jokes Ever

Imagine if you were an Arabic person shopping at Walmart with your son.

Now imagine he got lost and you had to start calling out his name.

...Now imagine his name is "Allahu Akbar."

Chemistry joke: Why did the Superman being normal people when a krypton was at him?

Because krypton is "stable."

What's Bin Laden's favorite flavor of crisp? Plain.

Girls are like volcanoes.

You never know when they will erupt.

Two planes crashed into two separate towers.

Now two towers crash into two separate planes.

Some people think Bin Laden is dead, but some think he's alive.

He is the Al-Qaeda Elvis.

How much does a pirate pay for corn?

A buccaneer!

I was talking to a close friend that was Islamic.

He said he was being shipped to an amazing training.

I asked, "Where are you going?"

He said, "Camp Bin Laden."

I asked, "What do they do there?"

He answered, "They got bomb training and hand to hand combat training. Plus they got arts and crafts."

I asked, "What do you mean by arts and crafts?"

He said, "See this towel on my head?" I nodded. "I made it out of boxer jokes."

To start, I'm a big fella in size.

I saw a skinny guy act like Santa, so I went over to him. "You can't pull that off," I said. He said, "Then you try it." He gave me the Santa suit, and I dressed up. He walked by and saw me with 45 kids in line to sit on my lap and tell me what they wanted for Christmas.

Me and my friend were hunting ducks. He had a 12 gauge shotgun, and he looked over and I had a .50 caliber machine gun. He said, "You're crazy!" I responded, "Quackers."

Chuck Norris once took down a fence. Maybe you heard of it, the Berlin Wall.

I love telling stories as theatrical plays. When we had a free dress day near Christmas, my teacher dressed up as a reindeer, so I got my teacher involved... and shot her.

What animal gets easily offended? The chicken; they always get roasted.

My true hero is the person who killed Hitler.

Want to hear something that’ll make you smile? Your face muscles.

How do you annoy Pinocchio?

Ask him, "Do you always tell lies?"

What happens when you cross a rhetorical question with a joke?

What's the time?

How would I know?

How do Chinese people name their children?

They drop a tin can down a flight of stairs and call them the sound that's made.

A man is watching TV and his wife comes down and says, "I just fell down the stairs, did you not hear me?"

Man, "Sorry, I thought it was the start of Eastenders!"