Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

If I don't get a bf by the end of this month, Christmas lights won't be the only thing hanging from the roof.

Why can't orphans get five stars in GTA?

Because they're not wanted.

What do an X-Box and Michael Jackson have in common? They're both made of plastic and little kids turn them on.

A man runs into a church and shouts, "Are there any dwarf nuns in the monastery?" The Pope said no, causing the man to say to his friend, "I told you you fucked a penguin!"

Say this to someone who is fat that you don't like (make sure he's a virgin):

"You're so fat you can sell shaaade!! That's why you're a virgin and you masturbaaate!!! Yeah, I've see you, touching your 1 centimetre and if you have a gf she's is a cheater!!"

Make sure to say "shaaade" not "shade". And say "maturbaaate" (also try to say a D not a T in maturbaaate) not "masturbate".

Little boy: Momma?

Mom: Yes, my dear.

Little boy: One day I wanna work in McDonald's.

Mom: Why!?

Little boy: Just to see if their ice cream machine is actually broken.

Your mama so fat when she sits on the toilet it sings, "ABC, 123, get your fat ass off of me!"

Why can't orphans have sex?

Because they have no one to call "daddy."😳

The woman became extremely uncomfortable with the man she had just met. While he lay beside her, romantically kissing and stroking her neck he whispered, “I called the number you gave me at the bar tonight. Someone named Alvin answered who has never heard of you.”