Worst Jokes Ever
How to harass? Say it out loud but slowly. Split that word into, and it sounds like "her ass."
Yo mama so fat that when she sits around the earth, she sits around the earth.
How many skinny people can fit in a tub? I don't know; they keep slipping down the drain.
What do you call gay parents?
Poly.
What do you call a dog with no legs? Call him whatever you want, he's not coming.
I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before kicking the bucket: "Hey, wanna see how far I can kick this bucket?"
And so the Lord said unto John, "Come forth, and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.
Did you hear about the two thieves who stole a calendar? They each got six months.
Why do scuba divers fall backwards off of the boat?
Because if they fell forward, they'd still be on the boat.
What did the clock do when it was hungry? It went back four seconds.
My friend entered a pun contest. He entered ten, figuring at least one of them would win, but no pun in ten did.
Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be bagels.
I can swallow two pieces of string and when they come out the other end, they'll be tied together. I shit you knot.
I saw this advert in a window that said: “Television for sale, £1, volume stuck on full.” I thought, “I can’t turn that down.”
I used to date a girl with a lazy eye. Turns out she was seeing someone else the whole time.
How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Follow the fresh prints.
What's a footlong and slippery?
A slipper.
He installed a hacked client on his MC server called cancer.exe.
He is helping world hunger by feeding cancer.
So, my friend and I were talking this time. I asked them what they would do if they ever met Rengoku. They said that they would probably like shake his hand or something, but I said I would lick his forehead. Wtf?