Hell hates freezers, England, and soccer.
Worst Jokes Ever
Last night I shared a bed with two of my friends because we were in a small hotel. We had strange dreams last night.
My friend on the left dreamed of getting a handjob.
So did my friend on the right.
I had a dream of skiing.
Punch an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
I donated a computer to the orphanage...
It didn’t have a motherboard.
Someone was throwing Stephen King books at everyone. I had no idea why though...
Then IT hit me.
I love making jokes about orphans!
What are they going to do, tell their parents?
When you die, people cry and wish you to come back.
But when you do, people scream and run away.
Why did the hooker fall in love? Stockholm syndrome.
What's the difference between a hooker and a burrito?
I don't eat burritos.
What do my cock and money have in common?
Your mom.
How many dicks can fit inside of a hooker? I don't know, ask your wife.
I saw your mom at work the other night. She was talking about how good she was doing.
Hands down, best $20 blowjob ever.
When you find out the stripper you're banging is a hooker, but you're saving money, so it's okay.
How many hookers fit in a Cadillac?
About 4 in the trunk if you stack 'em right.
How many dead hookers does it take to change a light bulb?
Definitely not 13, because my basement is still dark.
The woman had a dick, lol, it's your mom ahahahahahaha, yeah YOU! Jhon man! In New York City I am on to you! I will be under your bed tonight lol get a bodyguard!
First of all, if a woman sues Bill Cosby for drugging and rape 50 years ago, and she could still remember it, it couldn't have been all bad.
I'm always hanging in there.
Hanging on the wall.
Teacher: "Ok class, what animal jumps the highest?"
Kid: "A leopard."
Quiet kid: "No, it's emo kids. Some of them are still in the air."
Kid: "Broooooooooooo."
What is the difference between an iPhone and an orphan?
An iPhone has a button to go home.
