My jokes

I spy with my little eye something starting with, actually I have TWO normal eyes.

My wife is pregnant with a 3-year-old, so I gave her medicine, but now she’s pregnant with a 5-year-old.

We were versing year 8 at footy, and they were mostly black, so I told my white friend to WATCH OUT!!!

What has 148 teeth and🥴🥴 holding back a monster? My zipper.

Where’s the English Channel?

Johnny: “I don’t know. My television doesn’t pick it up.”

"So what, ah, my G?"

I cut my dick. It is all right now, and half the size but makes for excellent breakfast.

I kicked my leg into my dad's balls in 1999.

I swear every time I walk past a guy, they stare at my ass. I always keep wondering why it hurts so much.

Hi, my name is Moo, what is your name? Moo.

My mom left me at a very young age.

What did a Jedi say to Darth Vader? "You're not my father, I am yours!"

Happy birthday to you, you look like a ball, can’t fit in my jaws, I try to suck it.

What’s the difference between the milk and drugs?

My dad brought the drugs back, not the milk though! 😭

I just want to say good morning to Gwen and everyone on this site. Have a nice day.

What if it's okay if someone can see my blue jokes, hello, bully, love, crazy, and Ariana jokes? Thanks!

Hello Honey Bunches, it's me, Your Narrator. I was told by my buddy youthpartorryan he's in the middle of a war... I may be super wholesome but war against my buddy? Ho ho ho, no! A STORM IS COMING. #BestFriends

My boyfriend's sister is mad because I smashed his girl.

Me: Bomber333 is the imposter!

Other Crewmate: Why do you say that as if you know who the imposter is with 100% certainty?

Then he read my username and knew.

James, sike, I lied, your mommy is pancakes, is so dry.

My best friend: Joey, sike, I lied, your Twitch is dry.

My other friends: the winner is................. my guy James!

What’s red, 11 inches, and makes my girlfriend cry when I slap her with it?

Her miscarriage.