Mum jokes

Your mum went to the dentist so she could install Bluetooth.

Your mum's hairline was so big that Dora the Explorer could not find it.

Your mum's hairline was so long that you decided to get therapy.

Mum: Why are you throwing a paper plane at the twins?

Me: 😈

Yo mama so fat, when she was telling me her weight, I thought she was telling me her number.

Yo mum's so dumb, she went to the library to find Facebook.

Your mom's so fat, when she stands on the scale, it says, "To be continued..."

What do you do after raping a deaf mute eight-year-old girl? Smash the little bitch's hands with a hammer so she can't tell her mum.

Little Jonny fucked his mum.

Your mum... payed other people to take you!!!!

"Your mum has very small balls. Congrats! I told her, your balls are bigger than your husband's."

Ur mum—oh wait, you don't have that.

What did the poo say when it fell out of your bum?

"Your anus looks like my mum's bedsheet which is smelly and covered in poo."

I also just wanted to add that a Goonie's anus looks like my nan's mouth.

Your mum is so fat, when she slept on the bed, the bed cracked and they had to replace it by a dinosaur.

Beans, your mum is fat!

Your mum's so fat, she fell into the Grand Canyon and got stuck going down.

The Golden State? More like your mum's state...

Raaj went up to his mom and said, "I bet you 10 dollars I can disappear." Then he turned off the lights.

I look at an orphanage, then hug my mum. He just looks sad and crude because he couldn’t find his mum.

Your mum is so fat, when I was driving I had to swerve to avoid [her]. By the time I had finished, I had ran out of gas.