Movie jokes

What is an orphan's favorite quote in Star Wars?

"I am your father!"

You are so ugly, when the Joker saw you, he stopped laughing.

What’s an orphan's favorite movie?

Home Alone.

You're so fat, Thanos had to snap three times to destroy you.

What do the Titanic and the Sixth Sense have in common?

Icy dead people.

Thanks to an unfortunate typo, it's the most one-sided action movie ever.

Alen vs. Predator.

I saw Simba walking slowly.

I told him "Mufasa!"

What is the difference between Batman and Black Panther?

Batman returns.

I was making fun of an orphan, then I realized he tracked me down. I made a bad decision. He was Batman!

Why do Jedis stay single?

Because they use "divorce" (the Force).

May divorce be with you!

Why didn’t Harry Potter use the chamber to teach Dumbledore’s army?

Because at one point poisonous gases were put in it.

They're making a new Alien movie.

There are so many aliens you can't keep track.

Tongue Trick Sex: The Movie.

Not coming soon!

So cinema.

Why is your forehead so shiny? Did somebody laminate you? You're so shiny, Mulan can look into your forehead and sing "Reflection."

In the new Justice League movie, Flash can break glass by touching it, why is that?

Because Flash is not supported on Windows.

A fact! I think I'm officially a poo-buster, as the plunger does look like the weapon in "Ghostbusters"!

What's Jack's favorite flower? A rose.

Why do orphans love Dom Toretto?

Because "family is everything!"

Did you guys know that Chancellor Palpatine is suing Nike?

Apparently, the company stole his slogan: Just "Do It."