Movie jokes

Your dad is Spider-Man because he’s far from home.

What do you think of the Bill Cosby movie?

Netflix and alcohol.

What is the favorite movie of orphans?

Spider-Man: Homecoming.

Q. What's Terri Schiavo's favorite movie?

A. The Purge.

If she's not ready for an X-rated movie, she's not ready for this X-rated booty.

My wife and I watched the movie Indecent Proposal last night. Afterwards, I asked her if she'd sleep with Robert Redford for $1,000,000. She said, "Sure, but where am I gonna get that kind of money?"

Your dad's Spider-Man because he's far from home.

Why do people hate Velma now?

Because she joined the Dark Side.

What is King Kong for dinner?

Humans.

I was watching The Perfect Murder with my boyfriend. It was a good movie, but the weird thing was that my boyfriend was taking notes throughout the whole movie.

What do you call a chubby Robert Pattinson? The Fatman.

Your mama is so fat, when Thanos snapped his finger, she only lost weight.

What's white but not black, and red all over?

J. K. Rowling after attending the world premiere of the next Matrix movie.

Yo mama so stupid that she tried to ride Ponyboy Curtis.

What did Warner Brothers get for making that horrible Joker sequel?

They got what they fucking deserved!!!!!!!!

I work at a movie studio.

Unfortunately, the team I was working with was useless.

The team:

What did one orphan say to the other orphan?

"Get in the Batmobile, Robin!"

My teacher made us watch a movie about the struggles of being an overweight person in this day and age.

It was really heavy on me.

You're so fat that when Thanos snapped his finger, you broke the correction.

What is Saturn's favorite movie?

Lord of the Rings.