Move jokes
I play saxophone, and I like to tell everyone I am a registered s/o (short for saxophone operator) in hopes of one day starting a jazz band, but now everyone looks at me weird, and when I go to house parties to perform, everyone hides their children, but little do they know I LOVE children. For some reason, I got multiple restraining orders because I said, “I want to touch the kids so they can one day become musicians themselves... like Michael Jackson.” I have then since moved from my hometown to Florida, where I can meet up with other s/o’s, and surprisingly, they have similar stories to me, but they say they have never even touched a saxophone, but they do like touching kids, which I’m all down for, just me and my buddies showing the new youth their abilities.
Update: i figured out what they meant by s/o is not the same as my s/o :(
Dad: Son, do you want to play Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots?
Son: Sure, let me get it from the closet.
Dad: No, bring your sisters. Just like the game, they can’t move their legs.
Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. It's not dead, just afraid to move.
Your hair line is curved like a moving train.
Mom tells her son to go to the other kid, to walk to the kid just standing still, to clap so the kid can hear and move out of the way of the car.
But her son was blind, the other kid had no legs so he couldn't walk, and the kid has no arms so he couldn't clap, and the kid died because he couldn't hear; he was deaf.
What makes a healthy normal man different to a disabled man?
"They can move it, move it." (from King Julian)
My crush rejected me 2 years ago, and I still have never moved on. I'll be over her when a train is over me.
School Rizz:
You are my exam. I am always thinking about you but never making a move.
How fast does 173 move?
Breakneck speeds!
Women are like iPhones, you have to touch them all over before they respond. Men are like Blackberrys, rub one ball and everything moves!
What is a Mexican's favorite move in a video game?
Wall jumping.
You’re so fat,
that your family moved to the other side of the U.S.A., but they still see you.
(First Person): Knock knock, who's there? (2nd Person): Lemme talk to you, when we finna slide, what we finna do, knock knock, who's there, time to make a move, slayin' all then demons and we gotta move in too.
(Second Person): Knock knock, (1st p): who's there, let me talk to you, be careful where you steppin' out cause you ain't bullet proof, knock knock, who's there? time to make a move, block is full of shooters, and they didn't come to hoop.
What excuse can you use if you find out your date is a rape victim and you don't want the baggage?
Say you've parked your car in a bad spot and are just going to move it, then move your car all the way back to your home address.
Your hair is so far back, you left it at your last address.
You're so poor, when you kicked a can, a man asked, "Are you moving?"
I see 2 fighting with 3. "What's going on?" I ask. 5 responds: "The numbers are moving on up."
How do you beat Hellen Keller in musical chairs?
You move the chairs.
Yo mama so scary, the government moved Halloween to her birthday!
Tell me a joke about my hairline.
No, because he don't got one, feel like Donald Trump, it don't move.