Morbid jokes
What do you call a swearing piece of shit?
Cus-turd.
My mom asked, "Why are you so depressed? It could be worse. You could be Tracy Latimer."
I replied, "I wish I were Tracy Latimer because then someone would kill me."
Jerry Garcia: I’m going on a TRIP today!
Bob Weir: Where are you going?
Jerry Garcia: I’m already on it. 😯🦄🌈
What does this mean? 👊🥩
An Emo kid in a tree falls. At the same time an apple falls from the same tree, what hits the ground first? The apple would be due to the kid's rope and noose.
pussi
There were three men, and two of them died.
The last man alive said, "That's two less mouths to feed!"
Abortion is not murder, it's just canceling your preorder.
What type of pizza do they serve on an airplane?
Plane pizza.
More like so they can fuck him, am I right?
Q: How do you make a fire?
A: Oil and dead babies.
Stormtroopers, I guess they never miss, huh?
The granddaughter wanted to see granny. She killed herself.
What’s the difference between a cat and a dog?
It’s easier to throw a cat against the wall.
Have you ever said no? Did they keep going?
Why did lil Timmy drop his lollies?
He was hit by a train.
What is a tree that does not exist?
A money tree.
Deeeeeertt.
What's the difference between a boy and girl? A boy always carries an average 5in "do not enter" sign.
If a lawyer gives birth to a stillborn baby, is it considered a miscarriage of justice?