Morbid jokes

"Wanna hear a construction joke?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Wait, I'm still working on it!"

What does PEMDAS stand for?

Penis enters my dad and sister.

I heard they're making a film about Jimmy Savile, it's a very touchy subject.

I heard the film about is so boring it puts you to sleep.

"GWEN, can you help me? There's some person messing with me. There name is JADSA, something like that. Look for a joke named Jayden."

My family is like Donkey Kong: a real pain in the ass.

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid Blanket?

What would you call a cover for your cock?

👌neck

Despacito.

So I was eating this girl out the other day, and I GOT AIDS. How does a 9-year-old give me AIDS? I guess my sister was hanging around the wrong crowd.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Porsche?

I don't have a Porsche in the garage.

Cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer.

Better to cum in the sink... than to sink in the cum.

"Peppa's ribs."

Why did Germany win World War Two? Wait—that's not right... um... excuse me while I look up who won the war...

*disconnected*

What did the girl get for Christmas?

Cancer.

What's the difference between a yandere and a gun?

Nothing.

Flip them off the wrong way and you're dead.

Want to hear a joke?

Ohio State football.

When my friend says I suck at something, I'm like, "U swallow."

What's the hardest part to eat of a vegetable?

The wheelchair.

What's the worst thing about eating a vegetable?

The wheelchair.