Morbid jokes

Two people walk down the road. One says to the other, "Mitch, we passed Weight Watchers 2 minutes ago." He responds, "Jake, the noodle shop is just here. You've been carrying that sh*t on your head for 14 years!"

Ur mum gay, lul.

Bored.

"Muffin Man, Muffin Man, he's gonna rape you in his van."

Guess what? Chicken butt.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Anal.

Q: What do you call white people on a black bus?

A: Oreo

Five little monkeys jumping on the bed.

One fell off and bumped his head.

The momma called the doctor and the doctor said,

"Why the heck were my children jumping on a bed?"

When you pull out, but the baby's face turns blue.

Poo.

My life, your life, and your sister is a slut.

Wanna know something funny?

- Women's rights.

Abraham Lincoln was a good man, he jumped out the window with his dick in his hand and walked up to a group of ladies and said I'm doing my duty so why don't you give me some booty?

I like the iceberg... my favorite character was the iceberg!

Why couldn't Sally get back up? Because she has no friends.

Say, "Crack my fingers."

Now say that backwards...

Dfhbbfd.

When you see your friend, you call the police, but they just moan.

Hola.

What's an old man's favorite food?

Wrinkled onions.

Shia Mehdi unlived by beard guy looooool 🤨