Mom jokes

Why did your mom cross the road?

You were on the same side as her, and she wanted to get as far away from you as possible.

My mom said my sister was an angel, but when I threw her out the window, she didn't fly.

Why couldn't your mom make you dinner? Because she's dead!

At weddings my mom always tells me I’m next. So I say the same to her, at funerals.

Why did the baby cow cross the road?

To find its mom who has the milk.

Knock, knock.

Your mom.

Guy on Fortnite: "Ima sleep with your mom lmao."

Orphan: Starts crying.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his mom said, "Ven bakac."

Dad: Alive.

Brother: Orphan (fault=Mother).

Me: Dead on the inside but sadly alive.

Mother: Alive...

Wait a minute... I thought you were dead, Mom... Right, you're dead to me at least.

What do you call multiple quintuplets that look the same?

Naruto's mom.

Where's your mom at?

I woke up today, and my mom said it was 1940.

When your mom says it will all be ok if you just......... *there is blood on the floor*

When you say, "I wish I could cut off these bumps on my neck." (Your mom walking to you with a knife.)

So a kid was hanging out with his mom and this man comes up to him and said, "Hi, I'm your new dad." The kid did not think about it, and then he did and said, "But I already have a dad." The mom said, "That was not your real dad."

Mom, start eating, or else you will get fatter!

The woman had a dick, lol, it's your mom ahahahahahaha, yeah YOU! Jhon man! In New York City I am on to you! I will be under your bed tonight lol get a bodyguard!

One day my mom told me not to be an actor. I said, "But mommy, I will make a lot of money!"

So you mom call she side when Covin come home?

Your mama is so ugly, when she went to the circus they thought she was Pennywise, Mom.