A daughter asked her mother how to spell penis, her mom said you should have asked me last night it was at the tip of my tongue.
Dear NASA, your mom thought I was big enough.
–Pluto.
My mom smashed my x-box so I smashed her daughter.😏
I told my mom I'm happy and she said: "I didn't know you were gay."
Your mom is so fat that she cannot look her feet when taking a shower
Your mom is so fat that she only knew 3 letters which is K F C
Your mom is so fat that she thought Eminem is a candy
A boy was terrible at writing sentences so his teacher gave him an assignment to help with that. The boy was to go home, write five sentences and return to school the next day. When he went home, he took a notepad and a pen and went to his dad for help. His dad was in a very important business call so he angrily shouted at the child “Shut up you Donkey!” The boy noted down that sentence. He next went to his mom who assumed that he wanted to play video games so she said “No my dear, tomorrow.” That was his second sentence. For the third sentence he went to his older brother who was watching football where someone scored a goal so he was jumping up and down yelling “Goal! Goal!” For the fourth sentence he went to his sister who was singing “Spider-Man Spider-Man!”. For the last sentence he went to his grandmother who was cleaning the toilet and singing “Under the toilet, under the toilet”. He went to school the next day and his teacher asked him to tell her the sentences. The boy said, “Shut up you Donkey!” The teacher got angry after hearing this and asked the boy, “Do you want me to slap you?” The boy said, “No my dear, tomorrow.” This made the teacher so angry that she slapped the boy. Immediately he started jumping up and down yelling “Goal! Goal!” The teacher dragged him to the principal’s office as she was fed up with him. The principal asked the boy what his name was to which he replied by singing “ Spider-Man Spider-Man!” She asked him where he lived so he sang “Under the toilet, under the toilet”.
Your mom is so fat that she works as a hydraulic press in a car factory!
Ur mom so stupid that she thought that Seventeen has four ghost members.
As a straight son, one day I asked my mom, "Have you ever quit something that you did before?" My mom said, "No, I never quit anything." So I asked my when you give a blow job you ever spit, then my mom said, "What did I say? Quitters are for spitters."
The only thing drier than these jokes is your mom.
word kskfkrke;welkt kdkfgkyour kfksdfksdmomfkdjg
My dad never came back with the milk my mom told me he's in the army
My mom has a toy that I see the all the girls and guys seem to play to play with and the toy is between my mom's legs.
What do alien moms like to drink? Starbucks.
How do crabs honor their mom’s birthday? The shell-abrate.
What do you call a mom that can’t draw? Tracy.
What did mommy spider say to baby spider?
You spend too much time on the web.
Why was it so hard for the pirate to call his mom? Because she left the phone off the hook!
