New Mistake Jokes

I used to think 11/11 was mistakenly 911

if a dog is white with black spots then it is 90% great and 10 % guilty because it half way starts crimes and is a mistake to the world and is punished by the white dogs that are full white and not mixed colors

One spelling mistake can completely ruin your marriage

I accidentally texted my wife “I’m having a wonderful time. I wish you were her.”

Dear Autocorrect i never wanted to spell the Word "bigger"

When you accidentally turn in your suicide note instead of your essay to the teacher, but she still gives you an A

My husband asked me to get 6 cans of Sprite at the store. I realized when I got home that I had picked 7Up.

The brain named itself, and when the brain realised that it named itseld, it was surprised.

But maybe, it was a spelling mistake and the brain wanted the name Brian. We all have a little Brian in us!

i was trying to make homemade baby powder until i realized it isn't made from babies , oops wrong ingredient ... smh

Teacher:"What is the opposite of the following sentence: 'Children in the dark make mistakes'?" Student:"Mistakes in the dark make children"

Why were the world trade center so Mad because They ordered 3 pizzas but 2 came in plane and 1 went to the wrong address

You learn from mistakes! That's why you're an only child!

Yo barber fucked up so bad he pulled out a plants vs zombies map and that shii fit perfectly

When my son was little, he loved to draw. Although he would always rip up the paper whenever there was one little slip up. Too bad he became a tattoo artist.....

The twin towers ordered 3 tacos. One was just a plane tortia. The other one was also just a plane tortia. And the third one went to the wrong adress.

quit making Plane jokes there just PLANE wrong

Wanna see an mistake go on camera and take an pic of you

I asked my wife to embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.

I was walking down the street when I saw my ex-girlfriend so I fuck her, turns out it was her identical twins that she never told me about. And I decided to confront her. So I did the next time I saw her but this time it was her Identical triplet. There 3 of them.... AND SHE NEVER BROUGHT THAT UP IN THE 7 YEARS I WAS DATING HER!

Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marihuana, Jack got high and slapped his thigh and said you know you wanna, Jill said yes picked up her dress and said lets have some fun, silly ole Jill forgot her pill and know they have a son.