Mine jokes
"PENIS WAIT WHAT OENIS SUCK MINE DADDY?" Sorry, you are an orphan.
Is your mom a virgin?
Mine is.
How am I alive?
You tell me.
What do you call a monkey in a mine field?
BaBOOM!
Son: Dad, I need a new butt.
Dad: Why, son?
Son: Because mine has a huge crack in it.
So, I was walking down the path of my life with Bigfoot, noticing the two pairs of footprints, mine and his.
One day, I notice his prints are gone. I look up to him and say, "You had promised you would always be there for me. How is this possible?"
He then looks me straight in the eyes and says, "Raw!"
A man walks in to the doctor.
He says, "Doctor, I need a new butt. Mine has a crack in it."
Doctor: How many times do I have to tell you!!!
What is the difference when I have my dick in your mouth or when you have yours in mine?
Oh, I forgot, you don't got one, bitches, suck my dick.
5 Little Monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said... "Wait, why are there mines all over the floor?"
Sike, I lied, your Minecraft account is mine!
I am looking for a Robert "Jamie" Weber. He is a friend of mine from 3rd grade that welcomed me as the new kid. I am currently in 6th grade going into 7th grade (summer brake).
Patient: I am sorry, it is my first surgery.
Doctor: Don't worry, mine too.🫡👍
Why does everyone say there are mines in Bosnia? There are no-
Where did the children go after he stepped on the land mine?
There, there, over there, and over here too.
What's your favorite type of flour?
Don't know.
Mines self-raising.
What state do miners hate?
Oregon.
I just gotta come out and say it: I like miners, and I don’t care what y’all think. I mean the fact that they are risking their lives just to make ours a little easier is amazing. I’ve always wanted to marry one, to be honest. Y’all need to give more respect to the mining ⛏ community.
Mine never stops.
A man walks into a bar carrying a big chunk of asphalt and says to the bartender, “Make mine a double Scotch and one more for the road.”
You say this to your friend, "Damn, your nuts are bigger than mine!" *thinks the wrong way*.
Friend: I must order more nuts.
A man said his bars are lit. I said no, because mine are fire.