Mine Jokes

If you thought other people’s puns are bad well you should sea mine. https://d2v9y0dukr6mq2.cloudfront.net/video/thumbnail/Vfv9BDZagiltwcyiq/underwater-sea-mine-danger-weapon-deadly-naval-ocean-sea_hvqhxuzi__F0000.png

If I adopt a child is it mine ?? 🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯😳

Mr. Smith: Neona, tell us what you have for the biggest competition that we can do to keep our competitors out of the winning streak.

Neona: Will thought we used more sales and more advertising.

Mr. Smith: It's already a good idea. Now what about the business plan? We need it as recommendations to keep the business going. Tell me, what do you have in mine?

Neona: It is better to always have a plan. I was thinking that we can get higher prices and always get great deals, the people will go nuts for a great deal!

Mr. Smith: Perfect. Now let's take a 5 minute break.

Mr. Smith: Ok, 5 minutes is up!

Now Neona, I know you are an intern, but what are the best things we can do for the company?

Neona: Hmm...lets see...will we can start with all the things people love! If this is going to work then we have have to......

Patient: Sorry I'm so nervous, this is my first surgery.

Doctor: Oh don't worry, mine too!!

a friend of mine chews gum lays back to yawn then chokes on the gom then i said god what u choking on dick?

Whats big and round? Mine and not yours

Girl come hear my parents aren't home orphan mine are never

yoo back off from my homey freshfry he mine

creeper, aww man today we back in the mine got our pickaxe swinging from side to side side side to side

A friend of mine told me something that I cannot forget and I am now traumatized to hell, the next day a kid was set for an amber alert that looked exactly like my DEAR friend. :)

-Dark_Humor

I have a friend of mine from school, I always see them with bangs so I never knew what their forehead looked like until one day they came.. their forehead was bigger than Mount Everest that you can make an entire Olympics mountain climbing audition on that forehead. :)

-Dark_Humor

I went to go mine for some gold, but then I saw some shorts :Friend " Your jokes are to short" Me: "Zip it, my jokes are always golden." :Friend "Your such a ingot, don't forget your jokes are always Aurum." Me: "I know my jokes are Aurum, it's always because I always glitz" :Friend "at lest I have luminescent" (Get it? Lu mines cent)

Friend: My girls are like boomerangs they always come back Me: Mine DONT:(

today my idiot brother screamed"ahhhhh im dead!' but it wasn't really, so i d3cded to make it a reality until my sister came.............................

AND HELPED ME! - for once but then two minutes later my mom showed up, we k!lled him right infront of her and she screamed! "DONUTS AND PIZZA FOR YPU AND MORE IF YOU GO TO MRS ROBERTS HOUSE AND SAY HI AND BYE TO DADDY!!!!! and she hands us both a sharp tool and i say what about tommy??!!! arn't u MAD!!!!!!! then she replied who's THAT!!??? COZ HE AINT MINE HIS NAME IS TOMMY, TOMMY ROBERTS. so then me and my sister visit mrs ROBERTS AND SHE SAID OH THIS ISN'T ANYTHING IMPORTANT GO HOME! so then my sister nd i say hi! and do a countdount aftr that my nike white jumper had turned red! IT WAS A MUCH BETTER COLOUR , MUM SEEMED TO APROVE AS WELL!😊😊😊 but then the police question us where daddy was so then mom said....................... oh he's moved on! so then the police officer was like ahem ma'm where! SO THEN I BELLOWED.......................... UP - UR -A##. And we got let off the hook, then we moved oh and we k!lled the cop 2 and oh did i meantion we HAD a maid, and a landlord and a cat but they were all 2 annoying so we got rid of them and now our new backyard is very smellyyy and i dont think there is enoff space to put muummy anymore so now i dont think sissy will fit either🧐 i will ask my neibour nessy she'll obviously say YES or ill........................................

ok like for part two☺☺☺

What’s your favorite type of wood? Mine is Bollywood

3 boy chiwawa were hot about this girl chiwawa. She tells them I will date whichever one of you can use liver and cheese in the same sentence. First dog say... I love cheese but liver is bland. She replay.. Really original. Next dog.. I love liver but chesse makes me constipated.. She replay.. Ewe gross. Third dog steps up.. Man Liver alone cheese mine. Winner dog 3.

I hear coal mining is a rock-bottom job.