Men

Men jokes

Orphan

A man and a boy went into a forest. The boy said he was scared. The man said, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone."

Double Standard

When a man sleeps with a lot of women, he's called a stud. When a woman sleeps with a lot of men, she's called your mum.

Woman

Why is it that skinny men love fat women?

Because we need warmth in the winter and shade in the summer.

Jesus

Why couldn't Jesus have been born in Florida?

Answer: They wouldn't be able to find "Three Wise Men" or a virgin!

Memes

Sex worker

What do you call a physically disabled man who is sitting on the toilet inside the handicapped stall inside the men's restroom?

Sex worker.

Reincarnation

"The only way I'd want to be reincarnated is if I can be reincarnated as a man," said the young woman.

"Why?" said her friend.

"Oh, I don't know, just men are so cool,"

"Is that the only reason?" said her friend.

"Maybe........" said the young woman. "Maybe."

Man

I like men like I like money, always getting lost under my bed.

Viagra

Why do men find it so difficult to solve puzzles after taking Viagra?

Because they just keep getting harder and harder!

Yo mama

What's the difference between yo mama and German men?

The balls... German men don't have them.

Crime

What is a victimless crime in the state of Michigan if you are an able-bodied man who is well-endowed, not white, and not a heterosexual male?

A white male who is heterosexual and physically disabled who is sodomized by an able-bodied and well-endowed gay male who is not white inside the men's locker room at the gym.

Baseball

Why can't men play baseball?

Because no one can take the word "balls" seriously anymore.

Wish

Three men were lost in the desert and found a genie who granted each of them a wish.

The 1st man wished he was home with his family. The 2nd man wished he was home with his family, and the 3rd man wished they were all back together again.

Makeup

Women be like I don't wear makeup for men.

Then get mad when a man doesn't compliment her in her makeup!

Manslaughter

I will never understand why manslaughter is illegal.

Men should be able to laugh at whatever they want.

Demon

When you tell the men in the suits you can see that the demons of your sins are watching you...

But they know you're blind.