Men jokes
What show do gay men watch?
"2 and a Half Men!"
Lol at this one fellas!
What do you call an older white man surrounded by young black men in the 1800s?
Master.
What do you call an older white man surrounded by young black men in the 2000s?
Coach.
Three men were going for a drive through the desert. An hour later, the car breaks down. They all take something from the car to keep themselves cool as they walk to the nearest gas station a few miles back.
One guy grabs a hand-held fan. Another guy grabs the jug of water. The last guy takes the car door off. About 15 minutes into walking, the other two are giving the one guy weird looks. Finally, one of them asks why he is taking the car door. The third guy just replies that whenever he gets hot he can just roll down the window.
Why are Black women dating white men?
So their kids don’t have to worry about not meeting their father.
1, 2 look at your shoes.
3, 4 they look better than yours.
5, 6 you have no friends.
7, 8 you look like a ape.
9, 10 don't you like men?
11, 12 hell naw I like females.
I told my therapist you are too fat and ugly to date grown men. Then she asked me, "You wanna give a judgemental reaction about that?" I said, "Okay, you smell rat pee on somebody's cock."
A guy starts chatting to a pretty woman at a party.
Seeing that she didn't back off, he asked her name. "Carmen," she replied. "That's a nice name," he said, warming up the conversation. "Who named you, your mother?"
"No, I named myself," she answered.
"Oh, that's interesting. Why Carmen?"
"Because I like cars, and I like men," she said, looking directly into his eyes. "So what's your name?" she asked.
‘BJ Titsngolf’
You're so bald, the Hair Club for Men has elected you president.
Men vacuum in the same way that they have sex. They just put it in and make some noise for 3 minutes before they collapse on the couch and think that their wife should be really happy.
Why do Catholic Irishmen in Ireland have a glory hole in the men's restroom inside their restaurants so they can give Irish kisses on Saint Patrick's Day?
I will never understand why manslaughter is illegal.
Men should be able to laugh at whatever they want.
Three gay men enter a bar in Iran. They don't come out.
Why do men fart louder than women?
Because women can’t keep their mouth shut to build up any pressure.
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair playing soccer?
Rocket League!
(Ali A Intro)
I like men.
Wanna smash?
Suck my balls.
I'm in class as I'm posting this ass joke.
This joke sucks terribly.
Honestly just like and leave.
Add me on discord.
IceyTrae#2230
Lebron>MJ
Two men are in a rainforest, and one of them is peeing. Suddenly, a snake jumps out of some bushes and bites the man’s penis. The other man says, “Oh my God, I will go to a doctor immediately!” He didn’t have enough time to load the man into the car, so he went straight to the hospital. The man told the doctor what happened, and the doctor said, “You will have to make an incision at the wound and suck the poison out.” The man went back to the other man and said, “There is no hope, you will die.”
What's the difference between football and rape? Women don't like football.
Two Chinese men walk into a bar.
"Owwwwwwwwwww," they say instead of "ouch."
Two men broke into a drugstore and stole all the Viagra. The police put out an alert to be on the lookout for the two hardened criminals.
Boys are like minis.
Girls are like big pots.
Minis always come first. Don't think about sex boys, be men.
Catholic men say eating broccoli is like anal sex.
If you’re forced to have it as a child, you probably won’t like it as an adult.