Media jokes

Why’s BBC called BBC?

The dude’s shlong gets bigger every time he says n-

Why do depressed people want to kill themselves?

To be loved on the news show for 10 minutes.

What is the cherry's favorite cartoon?

"Tom and Jerry!"

The media's relationship with Hillary is just like Bill's relationship with Hillary. The relationship is unwanted and forced, and they'll move on to the next person any chance they get.

Me: I'm retarded.

Teacher: Why?

Me: It took me 2 hours to see "60 Minutes."

Who is M.J.'s cartoon character?

Muzan Kibutsuji

Hehe

Men and women are not equal, speaking biologically and mentally. I don't care what other feminists say. Men are naturally physically stronger, while women are more mentally stable (sometimes). The internet and the media will lie. You feminists say that you are stronger. Well, you wish. You can't hit a girl because she is more sensitive, but she says she is stronger. Like, what the hell?

We're not sexist men; you're sexist women. And BTW, you'll rot in hell for hating God's creation. And also, men were created before women. Search it up in the Bible or online.

My version of the Roses are Red Poem in MW3:

I thought Soap could trust you. And so did I too. So WHY IN BLOODY HELL DOES MAKAROV KNOW YOU?!

So this dude comes home from work one day, and his wife is watching the Food Network.

The husband asks, "Why do you watch that? You still can't cook," and the wife responds, "Why do you watch porn? You still can't f*ck."

What does a news anchor cow say for the weekly broadcast?

"Here's the beef of the week!"

What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper.

What is the difference between Nicole Brown Simpson and cancer?

OJ couldn’t kill cancer.

I heard the Kardashians were going on a cruise soon.

As if there's not already enough plastic in the ocean.

What do you call Joe from Family Guy in an electric wheelchair?

RoboCop.

What did Yoda say when he saw himself in 4K? "HDMI."

You say Alex Jones, I say Alex moans mmmmm. I like that fat, tasty big boy and his Rolex watches, mummy, he turns me on!

I want a series too, that will be SANS-tastic!

In other news, we are hearing of a nasty helicopter crash on the M4. Let's cross live to our eye-in-the-sky, Mark. Mark?

I don't really trust the press. Sometimes they wear badges that say "press," but if you press those badges, they just fall over, all surprised.

There is a joke that did not enter this page... Why? She is afraid they will laugh at her!