Man: Cow milk is drinkable.
Other man: How do you know that?
Man: *smiles with milk all over mouth*
Other man: John...h-how do you know that!
The man was dangling by a string! ... I was jealous the day he died
Iron man is just a golden retriever with a red background
I actually think Paul Walker was a good man, he did not deserve to be burned alive.
He had a change of race tho when he died.
A rich man and a poor man are talking about anniversaries. The rich man got his wife a Mercedes and a diamond ring. He says if the wife does not like the ring, she can take the Mercedes and leave.
The poor man said he got his wife slippers and a dildo. He says if his wife does not like the slippers, she can go and fuck herself.
How do you turn a hairy man into a feminist? Just take out his brain and there you go!
My country is so corrupt that it voted me as the most sexiest man.
Victory assured, I will continue like that till I'm six feet under.
what's a cannibals' favorite snack?
men toes!😂🤣
your hairline is so bad man i gae your doctor a breathlaizer
You're so poor, when you kicked a can, a man asked, "Are you moving?"
what did the man say about someone who had a seizure? "jit was lagging"
what do you call a man who loves adidas and puma and drives a volkswagen? potential nazi
Why did the Mexican man push her wife off a cliff?
Tequila
A man is dating three women and has to choose which one he'll marry. He decides to give them a test. He gives each woman a present of $5000 and watches to see what she does with the money.
The first woman does a total make-over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon, gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits to look sexy for the man. She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much. The man was impressed.
The second woman goes shopping to buy the man gifts. She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes. As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the money on him because she loves him so much. Again, the man is impressed.
The third woman invests the money in the stock market. She earns several times the $5000. She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account. She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much. Obviously, the man was impressed.
The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money... Then he married the one with the biggest breasts.
Why did the pumpkin man not go to the party? He had his hand stuck in a treasure chest.
Why do orphans have no parents Because it was bat man
You're so fat, the only thing you could be for Halloween is the Kool-Aid Man.
Who is the man behind all lives matter?
Michael Jackson.
"Hey, man do you have any ben and jerry's?"
"yeah I have two of them fresh and preserved in the freezer"
"I meant the ice cream bro..."
Woah man, you need to take a step back. Your hairline did, so I am sure you can.
