Mama jokes

Your momma is so fat, when she got in the Pacific, she became the Pacific Ocean.

Your mama's so ugly, she got everything for free.

Yo mama so ugly, when she entered the scare factory, she came out with a job application.

Yo mama so fat, she made Fat Albert jealous!

Yo mama so fat that she had to wear a yellow jacket and everyone shouted, "Taxi!"

The only people who do yo mama jokes wish they had a mom.

Yo mama's so fat, it took me two buses and a train to get to her good side.

Yo mama is so ugly that not even the Socs wanted to jump her.

Yo mama is so skinny, she can dodge raindrops.

Yo mama's so fat that when Legolas killed her, Gimli counted her for two.

What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? Where's popcorn?

Here's a Song That Describes My Old Life-By-watersharky Productions-

My buddies think I'm on the lake.

Boss thinks I've been sick for days.

And mama's probably on her way

'Cause I ain't picked up the phone.

I've been a million places,

But they're all up in my head.

Over-drinking, overthinking ever since you left.

I've been gone, I've been gone

I've been sittin' on the couch watching TV all day long.

All day long, I've been tryin' to figure out how a good thing went wrong

Faster than that freight train, farther than that airplane

Sadder than a country song.

Headed down that highway, anywhere but my way

Ever since you moved on, I've been gone.

Took a trip down memory lane.

Checked into hotel heartbreak.

Passed rock bottom on the way

Without leaving my living room.

I've been a million places

But they're all up in my head.

Over-drinking, overthinking ever since you left.

I've been gone, I've been gone

I've been sittin' on the couch watching TV all day long.

All day long, I've been tryin' to figure out how a good thing went wrong

Faster than that freight train, farther than that airplane

Sadder than a country song.

Headed down that highway, anywhere but my way

Ever since you moved on, I've been gone.

Yeah

I've been gone.

All the clothes are on the floor

All the mail's by the door

All the whiskey bottles in my bed.

All the dishes in the sink

All the gas is in the tank

All the neighbors probably think I'm dead.

I've been gone, I've been gone

I've been sittin' on the couch watching TV all day long.

All day long, I've been tryin' to figure out how a good thing went wrong

Faster than that freight train, farther than that airplane

Sadder than a country song.

Headed down that highway, anywhere but my way

Ever since you moved on, I've been gone (ooh, ooh)

I've been gone (ooh, ooh)

Gone

Yo mama so fat that when she went out in high heels, she came back in flip flops.

Yo mama's so ugly, when she was little, she had to trick-or-treat by phone.

You're so ugly that when your mama had you, she tried to give you away, but there was nowhere to give you.

If only Karen Carpenter had eaten Mama Cass's sandwich...

Yo mama is so fat, that when I unfollowed her on Instagram, my phone got 1 GB of storage.

Yo mama so fat, she ate McDonald's!

Yo mama so ugly, she got a lifetime ban from KFC for ordering too many burgers.

Yo mama is so fat that she's bigger than the cinematic Marvel Universe.

Yo mama is so old, she is the founder of the pyramid of Egypt.