Little Johnny is watching his dad shave one morning and his dad was making alot of mistakes. Suddenly his dad screams " bitches and asses!" Johnny asks what it meant and his dad replied " aunts and uncles" Oh. next thing he hears is "dicks and pussies!" Johnny asks " what's that mean?" To which his dad replied " uh coats and hats." Oh next thing he know he sees his dad jumping around the the bathroom yelling " fucking, fuck,fuck,Fuck" " what does that mean dad?" And his dad yells " cut Johnny, it means cut!!!!" Oh. Next week is Thanksgiving and the doorbell rings and Johnny answers it and says " Hey bitches and asses, hang your dicks and pussies here, dad's in the kitchen fucking the turkey.
I don't understand why in horror movies they make digging a grave look so easy, It usually takes me days
What do you do with epileptic lettuce? -- You make a seizure salad.
Q: you want to know way I don’t make jokes about 9/11 A: They tend to crash and burn
I don't like these Under tale jokes. They just don't make any Sans.
Dont trust atoms they make up everything.
what can you say to make a rape victim feel better?
"it will be over soon"
i want to make a joke about kobe but it wont land well
What's the same about "Make a Wish Program" and "Dark Jokes"?
They never get old.
How do you make an octopus laugh?
You give it ten-tickles.
Are you enjoying my yolks. I bet there making you crack up. If not, I better scrammble
my mom walks in a bar and the bartender said water saying we only sell beer
I make science puns, but only periodically :3
Person 1: Goodness, when is Michael Jackson going to stop eating these white chocolate truffles? He is already making a goddamn mess on his bed eating a few of them.
Person 2: Well, he cannot resist the little white balls.
Little johnnys teacher asks him "Johnny ,do you pray before you eat?" little johnny says "I dont need to, my mum makes good food.
What kind of Bees make milk?
BooBees
My mom always said garlic powder makes everything better so i sprinkled some on my divorce papers and my wifes broken leg.
How do you make someone in Africa disappointed
Sing raindrops keep falling on my head
Person 1: stop making suicidal jokes!? Person 2: okay okay, I’ll cut it out. Person 1: really? Person 2: their not even that deep.
How do you make a fruit punch? 🍎 You give it a pair of boxing gloves. 🥊
